The cancer's gone...and with it, it took my lovely John. He went only five days after my last post.
There are good days and bad days, since last Thursday. It's all so fresh still. Funeral doesn't happen for over a week.
I'm finding it very difficult to talk about things. Everyone in his family is so supportive and kind to me and the children. One of his brothers and his wife, and one of his odlest &…
With everything going so quickyl downhill lately, the young ones are well aware how poorly daddy is. One tries to stay out of the way and avoid it all by going upstairs to play; one draws pictures and makes cards and sings to him, trying to will him better; the other gets drinks, takes rubbish, brings food, holds his hand. But none of them are safe from his hurtful words. He says them without realising. The old version…
It was only two and a half months ago that I turned 39. My birthday "bash" was great. Cancer was pretty much put to one side, and we all partied like it was 1999, haha. Photos of john and his brothers and me and my ex-workmates. Everyone looked so cheerful and we all really enjoyd each others' company.
Fast forward a month an a half and John is having trouble. So bad he needs a syringe driver and can't…
Where do I start? He's mobile enough to help here and there a couple of times a day; but mostly just ambulatory enough to get in the way. Often times, he thinks he is helping but is doing something just a bit silly that needs undoing and then doing properly. He can't remember many things, nor say many things properly. I get frustrated because half the time I don't know what he's on about, or I am just trying to…
So the past few weeks have been hectic and eventful.
So many extraneous things going on in the family, i.e., legal issues with visitation for ex's parents with the children; family visiting from Los Angeles; new splint issues for poor little Emmie, which included having to buy a pushchair on the spot ona day out because she could tolerate the splint; school starting soon and school clothes/shoes shopping. Then, there…
