Feeling burdensome

Hi Beachyvibes. I don't recall seeing you about so welcome to our group. I can totally empathise with the "it's not fair" thing as I'm veering that way at the moment but I kick myself in the jacksie and shake myself out of it, otherwise I'll spiral downwards.

Might I suggest you sign up to Macmillan Buddies? take a look at the link I've attached. It's a service where you can chat to someone who knows how you're feeling.

What does your GP say about your anaemia? You shouldn't be continuously bleeding and passing out regularly, something must be done.

In all of this you have an amazing partner who is understanding and happy to look after you so take comfort in that. I feel like my calendar for the last 2 years has been NHS with hardly any social interaction. On one of the days I ventured out I caught Covid so I definitely think someone up there's got my name on their ammo!

Hugs, Barb xx

Hi MrsBJH,

Thank you very much for your kind message. Its really comforting to hear from someone on here.

I have just registered for the Macmillan Buddy system, they say they will aim to call me in 48 hours.

Normally I can kick myself in the jacksie and sort myself out, but I'm feeling particularly weakened and low at the moment. I seem to have spiralled and fallen into a bit of a pit, which I'm struggling to pull myself out of.

I'm on Medroxyprogesterone and Tranexamic Acid for the bleeding and they also put the Mirena coil in when I had the operation in June, but it's not helping.

Thank you so much. I'm so sorry that your outing caused you to get Covid.

I'm always here to talk to if you want some online social company.

Hugs, Tan xx

Hi Tan,

I'm sorry to hear that you are struggling. I understand and know how you feel. I am probably looking at ill health retirement from my job, which I loved (but was quite stressful). I felt like cancer had stolen my life which made me feel frustrated and fed up. Obviously the bleeding is having an effect on your health and you have more surgery coming up, which will take time to recover from but just wanted to give you a few ideas for further down the line.

My CNS referred me to Macmillan for counselling which was a telephone service and helped to a degree. When speaking to the chemo nurses they offered to refer me to Psychology Services at a nearby hospital. I have only had 2 sessions so far (in person, which is better) but feel like I have turned a corner. I have also just read Dame Deborah James' new book, which was also a big help regarding having aims and goals in your life going forward. I have found that by writing things down it has made me more accountable to myself for how I want my life to be and how I am taking steps to meet my goals. Obviously my aims now are garden, home and hobby based but you get the idea. The key is to take some control back and to plan for your good days when you feel well.

I hope your surgery goes well next week and that I've given you a few ideas for getting help. Take care,

A x

Hi ,

Thank you for your message. You have given me some hope and encouragement. I have surgery tomorrow, so feeling particularly anxious right now, but I've used music and singing to keep my mood up this afternoon and this evening.

I do enjoy gardening, so maybe I will take that up again. I also enjoy writing too, so I could get my head back into doing that. Great ideas.

Thank you so much.

I hope you are now finding your days easier. Always here.

Hugs, Tan xx

Hi Tan,

Thanks for your reply. I hope all goes well with your surgery today.

Just been to my psychology apt this morning, I've made a lot of progress since I last saw him 3 weeks ago and feel that my head is in a different place now so that's my sessions finished.

I like music and singing also, I think I sound like Mariah though, sadly my family think not!  To garden is to invest in the future, planting and sowing seeds etc.

Take care during your recovery,

A x