Hi. I’m new here. I’ve had the most stressful 6 weeks since my mum has been diagnosed with peritoneal cancer which is incurable. Since then my health anxiety has been through the roof and I’ve been checking absolutely everything.
Whilst checking I have found what I think is a large mass just inside my vagina. I don’t know how I haven’t noticed it before - I don’t know if I just thought it was normal for it to feel that way?! I feel like I’ve been so stupid.
I have a doc appointment today but my brain is in overdrive. I’m a single mum to two young girls. My mum has terminal cancer. I have no support. I’ve been reading into all the treatments and they sound awful. I’m especially worried about the hearing loss from chemo as I already have tinnitus. I’m so low - I honestly don’t know what to do. I am convinced I am poorly and it’s not going to be good news. I haven’t told my mum as she has enough on her plate. But I just don’t know how people cope with no one to support them or look after their children whilst on treatment.
I feel so alone and helpless. And this is even before they’ve confirmed its cancer. But I just know it is. 
Hi Kerrymarie I am sorry you are feeling so scared about your doctors appointment today, you have done the right thing getting this checked out. Anything we are unsure of needs to be checked, 9 times out if 10 it will be nothing to worry about, but we all know that early diagnoses is the key to a cure.
You are going through such a lot at the moment with your mum having an incurable cancer, and for anyone having a loved one with cancer it is extremely stressful. You do start to think about your own mortality, and having 2 young children to look after this is only natural.
The good news is you do not have to wait long to see the doctor, and hopefully he will put your mind at rest. Let us know how you get on today.
Hi Kerrymarie and welcome to the group.
I’m so sorry to read how tough things are for you right now, with your mum and now your own worries.
You have done what many people do when they are anxious-self diagnosed themselves with something before they have seen a doctor.
The thing is you don’t know it’s cancer, you don’t know what it is yet, so it’s best to try and concentrate on what you do know and that is that you have identified something odd and have made an appointment to have it investigated. It could be a cyst, a benign polyp, all sorts of things, so at the moment it will not be helpful to rush ahead and already have been reading about the side effects of chemotherapy. That’s not always the go to treatment for cancer in any case. Your anxiety is working overtime, and making you imagine all sorts but cancer of the vagina is extremely rare and normally affects older ladies.
If the doctor is unsure, he/she will refer you to a gynaecologist-this still doesn’t mean it’s cancer, it’s just that a gp is not a specialist in everything they may come across in their surgery.
I hope the doctor can reassure you that this is nothing serious, or refer you for more tests. You haven’t mentioned having any symptoms in your post, just that you have found something odd. Please come back and let us know how it goes with the doctor.
Sarah xx
