Getting positivity back

I’m so sorry to hear about your diagnosis. I’m also triple negative - first diagnosed in 2019. It’s a really tough thing to get your head around, and I’ve found that emotions can be really up and down- it’s honestly to be expected. You just won’t be positive all the time, and acknowledging that really helps. Just allow yourself to feel it, you’ll  get the positivity back in your own time. Having a good support network helps so much, and plenty of nice distractions also help; other things to focus on. Somehow you get through, and the downs are just part of it. Sending warm wishes xxx

Hi

Just wanted to say that you have made an important positive step by posting your feelings on here. There are so many people on this forum that have brilliant advice and understanding.

Have you talked to your breast nurse about how you are feeling? I was diagnosed in 2013 with triple negative at the age of 39. I’m currently going through the menopause and struggling a bit so my GP referred me to a gynaecologist who gave me lots of good advice and non HRT options I could try. I am currently enrolled on a 12 month CBT self help program. It’s all online and you can dip in and out when you need it. Along with this I have loaned menopause based mind books from my local library. This is definitely helping me to look at things from a different place, and whilst I agree it’s not a magic fix for everyone, it may be worth a call to your breast nurse to see if she can point you in the right direction of some similar. You have proved already that you can have a positive mindset, so it’s finding a way back to that space.

Good luck, you can do this.

I am sorry you are going through this. I also have TNBC, found in my routine mammogram in January. I had a wide area excision which whilst not infected, is still quite distorted and uncomfortable. I certainly expected a better cosmetic outcome, although it does look normal in a bra. I started chemo last week. I found it quite hard to take the decision to have chemo after spending too much time deep into risks and benefits. So it’s pretty horrible to be sitting here feeling off colour and knowing this is my life for the next 6 months. 

I am quite up and down about it. Most of my close contacts have been great but there are people who have effectively disappeared from my life, and others who spend forever telling me about so and so who had x treatment, regardless of whether x is relevant to me or not. You learn an awful lot about other people. 

it’s a cliche but the only thing any of us can do is take this one day at a time, and try to enjoy the better days we have. It will eventually pass. Try also not to get sucked into horror stories. People use resources like this when they need support and tend to move on when they are through it. Those who are struggling will stay engaged longer so there is going to be a bias towards their problems and outcomes. 

Find time for exercise if you can - it always helps - and lean on those you feel are being helpful.