I am in the pits

Hello lrose31909 

I am Brian one of the Community Champions here on the online Community. I have just noticed your post has gone unanswered. I can't give you a specific reply as I have a different cancer, however by me replying your post will be "bumped up" to the top of the group and I hope seen and replied to by other members of the group.

I know it's hard not to worry when "cancer" is mentioned and with 3 young children finding the time for "me" time can be hard. When you get chance, why not give our Support Line a call on 0808 808 00 00 (8am to 8pm 7 days a week). I am sure the great folk on the Support Line can help you with your feelings.

Best wishes - Brian.

Please try to keep positive until you’ve had a biopsy - I know it’s easier said than done. My husband had a smaller although still quite large vascular lump on his forearm last year. Ultrasound and MRI all suggestive of sarcoma but biopsy confirmed it benign. 

Thank you GS23. The anxiety was so overwhelming yesterday I had to really drag myself in to the ct scan. I just couldn’t hold myself together at all. The fear is all consuming. Never having had any anxiety at this level before I spoke (cried) to my GP who prescribed me Diazepam to try to help with the physical symptoms of anxiety. I actually managed some sleep last night which has helped and I have been much better today thankfully. I’ve gone about my day as normal. Now I just wait to hear about Biopsy. This has certainly made me evaluate my current circumstances and if, WHEN, I get through this there will need to be some changes made to prioritise what is important to me that’s for sure. Thank you for replying to this. It has helped. I can’t imagine the relief your husband and yourself must have felt receiving that news. Right now I’m too nervous to hope for that. I just need to be here for the children.

Irose31909

Glad you were able to have some help with managing the scan . Our bodies are built to react by fight or flight which is fine if we’re in a different era . I controlled it with concentration on my breathing giving me focus . This will slow the body down giving some relaxation. 
The waiting is very difficult but you are reacting as anyone would in the same circumstances.

GS23 is quite right in out lining the difficulty in diagnosing hence the need to have a biopsy because it is so rare that is the only real way to confirm.

Best Regards 

Do you have an update at all?

Hi GS23.

Yes. CT was clear. Biopsies taken and all benign. It’s a fibrous tumour. It was such a relief and I feel so silly getting myself so worked up like I was which really is unlike me. It’s the best news we could have hoped for. I’m scheduled to have it removed next week and it will be sent for further testing as the cells are abnormal and some samples (taken from different areas) were different to each other. I’m hoping it will be low grade and the chance of it making another appearance or spread is low. But really I’m just so glad it’s benign as we had prepared ourselves for some kind of malignant sarcoma.
Thank you for checking in. It really is appreciated.

I’ve been reading through this thread today, and I’m so pleased for you. I just wanted to say please don’t feel silly in any way for how you felt. My husband was diagnosed with sarcoma in 2022 (he’s thankfully been all clear for 3½ years), but that waiting part you’ve just been through was the worst experience of our lives. I wish you all the very best :)

Rachelle

Great news Irose

Delighted to hear your good news of the all clear.

Go smell the coffee!

Roadrunner 

Hi Rachelle,

Thank you. It really has been an emotional rollercoaster. For someone who is normally very calm, level headed and practical I was completely out of my comfort zone and not at all in control of my emotions. Scares like this certainly puts a lot into perspective. I did think that at least it is me going by through this and not one of the children. I could manage this as long as the children were ok.  I’m so glad your husband is in remission. How are you managing the regular check ups? 

Hi Roadrunner.

Thank you. And absolutely! The team here and there have been wonderful. We really were prepared for much worse. Your story and positivity has helped me a lot.