Old boy on the block

Hi,

I was diagnosed with advanced prostate cancer in March 2017.  

T3b N1 M0  Gleason 4+5.  PSA74.   I remember it was quite a shock as had never really been ill before, but I was a fairly fit 67 year old.

I just wanted treatment (whatever it was going to be) to start and everything seemed to be happening too slowly.  Initially Bicalutamide for two months and switched to Goserelin (Zoladex) with 12 weekly stomach injections.  I can only describe the next year as a roller coaster.  In October I started 6 rounds of 3 weekly cycles of Chemo (Docetaxel), but after 3 rounds went neutropenic ( pneumonia) which delayed round 4.  After the 4th round my Oncologist pulled the plug on any further rounds with the words ‘I don’t think you would survive another round’.  One part of me was disappointed that I hadn’t been able to give it the best shot possible.  Another part was desperately happy that I could recover slowly, which I did.  The following April I started radiotherapy (RT) with 37 rounds prescribed.  With Easter and other Bank Holidays it took well over 8 weeks to complete.  RT didn’t hurt and apart from the feeling of Groundhog Day was fairly easy, although as it is so gradual I didn’t realise what a tiring experience it was until I tried to do normal activities and found out how fatigued I was.

My PSA gradually went down to 0.1 and apart from quarterly bloods and occasional scans, I have ticked along for 6 years.  PSA is just starting to creep up (now 0.5) with a doubling rate of 5 months.  My oncologist describes that she has ‘ a cupboard full of goodies to throw at me ‘ once my PSA hits 2.  I am in no rush now!

What have I learnt in the last 7 years?  

Before my diagnosis I was needle phobic.  I was terrified if I had a cannula inserted and occasionally passed out if I saw a needle.  I am completely cured of that phobia!  

I try to eat well and when I can, try and keep fit (I play tennis and walk if I am not too tired).  I try to live normally (around appointments), do what I want to do now rather than leave it for later and try to stay positive (not always easy).

The single most important message is to listen to my body.  If I feel tired, I now know not to try and push through but to take it easy.

I was lucky that my wife always came with me to consultations.  Initially this was so important to have someone else listening as I couldn’t take it all in and we were able to compare notes afterwards.  In some ways this journey has been harder for my wife than for me (as I knew what was happening and she often didn’t).  I do know I would not have wanted to do this alone and at that point hadn’t found this MacMillan site.

Meeting fellow sufferers and reading blogs has taught me that we are all different.  Firstly in the stages when diagnosed with this disease, the way and speed it spreads, the treatments we receive along the way and how our bodies react to drugs.  The commonality we have is that we all go through the same disbelief at the start and concern that we have a serious illness.  Many of us will be cured and some will survive to die with PC rather than of it.  Some of us will not survive.  At the start, I honestly thought I wouldn’t make the next Christmas.  In parts of my journey I have had frequent times where I have thought I might not survive.   With the progress of research and advancement of treatments I am quite optimistic ( and the other option doesn’t sound too good).

Wherever you are in your own journey - good luck.