Alternative therapy

Hi. KVM85, welcome to the forum, though I'm sorry you have to be here,  as I can't have pain relief other than paracetamol, I have to use alternative pain management, would acupuncture be an option, or reflexology, I've found them both helpful, as well as  CBT and ACT, though having mental health issues, you would need to see if it's suitable, and there are always ice or heat packs which may help, I'm sorry I can't help more, but hopefully someone who can, will be along soon, my best wishes to you both.

Eddie 

Hello KVM85 and welcome to the group. My husband has been having a lot of leg pain recently due to cancer spreading into the bone which caused the muscles to harden and press on the nerves. He benefits from an osteopath who uses her skills to relax the muscles plus she taught me how to use a massage gun on my husband to help him in-between times so maybe this is something non invasive which your father might accept.

It must be difficult for you to see your father suffering and without treatment the cancer will continue to spread. Prostate cancer is usually slow growing and I presume he has had a scan telling him he has cancer in his lymph nodes? This could be a way of monitoring how quickly things are progressing in the future. Do you know if he has had a blood test for a PSA, or will he not allow this? This is very much new territory for most of us with refusing treatment but we must respect your father's beliefs. As to what comes next I am not sure we can offer much guidance as we are not medically trained but can I suggest you speak to Macmillan support on 0808 808 00 00 . 

Your post made me so sad. My heart goes out to you.

The combination of a strong religious faith and mental health problems is very difficult. 

I have a strong belief myself and find it a great comfort. I have suffered from anxiety and depression.

It sounds as if your dad is fixed in his beliefs and will brook no interference. It is sad.

There is something called "The Parable of the Drowning Man" (en.wikipedia.org/.../Parable_of_the_drowning_man which lead me to think about my own life. The doctors that help me are the equivalent of the boat and the helicopter.

I can tell you that acupuncture (or dry needling in some medical circles) has helped. Beyond that, please contact the nurses as mentioned above. They will help.

God bless,

Steve

Hi Eddie,

thank you for your reply and advice. I will speak with my dad about the options you have suggested and hopefully we can discuss them with his medical team to ensure they are appropriate alongside his other conditions. I really appreciate your input. Best wishes to you too x

Hi Alwayshope,

thank you for your response and advice. I will speak with my dad and hopefully look for local osteopath services. I will also look into a massage gun. 
dad has had numerous investigations to lead to his diagnosis, he wanted to know his condition as he feels that this will help him to be specific in prayer. He has had a PSA blood test, CT, MRI and endoscopy. I was not present when the results of the PSA were shared and dad can’t remember what it was, only that it was high. Dad doesn’t appear to be accepting the severity of his condition, it is unclear if this is due to his mental health or his belief that god will have a plan for him and therefore he doesn’t need to know the specifics. I will contact MacMillan support, thank you. 
Best wishes to you and your husband. X

Thank you for your good wishes, they are appreciated, and I hope the forum support can help and support you through these difficult times.

Eddie xx

Hi Steve,

thank you so much for your reply and advice. The parable you shared was very helpful, I have forwarded it to my dad. Regardless of our differing views, I am respecting his wishes and supporting him the best I can. I will give the nurses a call. 
best wishes to you x

Hello KVM85 

A belated warm welcome to the Macmillan Online Prostate Community - I am Brian one of the Community Champions here at Macmillan.

I can't add much to the posts above. I fully respect your dad's wishes and appreciate how hard it must be to be travelling on this journey with him. May I suggest you join this additional group:

 Carers only forum  

where you may find some ideas in how to best help dad.

I know it's a long shot but dad may wish to join this group where he can share his prayers and thoughts with others:

 Religion, spirituality and prayer group - Discussion Forum 

To join either group you just need to click on the link I have provided.

I wonder if dad would pop into a "Maggie's" if you have a local one - these are a cancer charity where you can just call in - no pressure and discuss your cancer - link here - Maggie's

As Alwayshope has said our Support Line is there for both of you on 0808 808 00 00 (8am to 8pm 7 days a week) and the wonderful folk on that number will be able to point you in the direction of further support.

If I can do anything else for you please let me know.

Best wishes - Brian.

Thank you Brian, 

I will join the carers forum and suggest the next the other to my dad although he’s not great with technology. I have had a look and there is a Maggies within 20 miles of us so I will see if I can encourage dad to attend. 
I am very grateful for the support and advice that I have found here. 

best wishes x