Help!

Hi

Have you any of his stats - PSA etc? The hospital should have told him. 

It's a great shock to be given the test results. I was fortunate my partner was there, as I didn't hear anything after the C word. Walked out in a daze. Guessing that, due to covid restrictions, you couldn't attend to hear the details from the Consultant, but they may not be as bad as he is saying. 

There are other Ladies on here who can help, I'm sure, as they are in the same position as you.

He should have been given a Cancer Nursd Specialist at the hospital - maybe you could have a word with them. Also, the nurses on here are brilliant, so speak with them.

Let us know his stats and I'm sure there will be someone on here who can help.

Regards

Stuart

Hi 2nv i was 50 at diagnosis, have it in my bones.  Hormone therapy is first line treatment.  The chemo is the stampede approach.  I was told thats there's many more lines of treatment after hormone so plenty of life left in me.  It took me a while before i could change my car. Even longer to make plans for over a few months in the future. Get him to speak to gp, hospital as mental approach is important for treatment. 

I feel for your partner as it will be such a shock to him.  However with the right treatment and care he should have years left to him and with new advances in treatment all the time maybe even longer.  My brother in-law was diagnosed with Stage 4 many years ago at the age of 54 and lived until 69 with treatment over coming a stroke and heart attack too and now when his oncologist sees my sister in law and two nephews at prostate cancer charity meetings tells them that if he had the drugs he has now he would likely have lived even longer.  So there is always hope.  Talking about sons and nephews the best thing I ever did was ensure that my two sons and any male relatives make sure they get PSA tests regularly from around age 50.  If your partner has sons this is particularly applicable to them as they are more likley to get this as their father has - my father had prostate cancer at age 80 and died with prostate cancer not of it but my younger brother and I were diagnosed at  age 72 but are now cancer free after treatment as we were having regular PSA tests and the cancer was caught early - this is why I tell everyone to get PSA tests as if caught early it is more likely to be cured.  

I can understand how your partner feels at the moment but that shouldn't stop you seeking help.  He shouldn't stop you asking for help either and if he does you will have to try and explain calmly (and when he has calmed down) that you need help and talking it through with cousellors or nurses or on online forums like this is good for you - he doesn't have to do it but you need it.  You can always talk with Macmillan Nurses or with Prostate Cancer UK specialist nurses on 0800 074 8383 - their lines are open Mon - Fri 9am to 6pm and Wednesdays 10 am - 8pm.  They were invaluable to myself and my wife at the time of diagnosis as it was very hard to understand things and take things in at appointments and often as soon as you got home you thought of another question to ask.  My key worker at the hospital was always so busy that I think I only managed to get in touch with her a couple of times but the Prostate Cancer UK nurses were brilliant for both of us.  You can also go to your local Maggies Centre if there is one at your hospital as they have also been really good to us. - There are other cancer self help groups and charities you may be able to find in your area too so just look them up. 

I do hope your partner realises that it is a help to talk about all the things he is going through - if not with other sufferers then definitely with you.

Take care and all the best.

Thank you I have the stats at home so will send them through once I get hold of them 

Thank you so much