Journey One

Hi Lynne - So sorry to hear you feeling like this but I think it's only natural and at the end of the day we are all different.

I look at everyday as the next day of the rest of my life - I have cancer - but I am/had treatment for this - I follow advice from the professionals, do what I am told, go to meetings, have tests - just had a PSA Test - oncology meeting 6 months after RT on Friday.

At the end of the day I am being treated and it's the new normal for me - I can't change it and now don't worry about the future. I am in a good place and lucky to be where I am. I enjoy my children more than ever - embrace my grand children and am no more the Grumpy Grandad!!

We are all different - I have had my bad days - but I think they are behind me and I look to the future......I hope this helps.

Best wishes - Brian.

Hi journeyone, some to near you've had a bad day. Even before the prostate cancer I have major doubts after committing to a holiday.it is our golden wedding anniversary.inJanuary and we want to do somewhere exotic and I can't commit to even booking in case something goes wrong! Stupid, I know but I think the lasting effect of cancer is that we lose confidence in our other half's body. The good thing about cruise ships is that they have their own medical centre! Try not to worry about what might be (wish l co uld) and enjoy your holiday. Where are you cruising to?

Hi journey one (Lynne) I had a bad day yesterday, I think it is because I try so hard to not let husband see how IAM feeling and then I wear myself reading stuff on the internet trying to find a nice answer that I want but know in reality I am not going to get. Good that you rang the Samaritans and spoke to someone. Now let's talk cruising. We have been on over 50 with p&o and a couple with celebrity and Cunard and absolutely love it. We have had to cancel 3 this year but gave more booked for 2024 as husband will have ended his chemo. What cruise are you doing and where us it to. 

Hi lynne

The worrying will never stop, my wife is in constant stress about me and that’s after seven years, everyone deals with it in different ways, a cruise is the start of this is a relief from all the treatment your partner received, it’s take a deep breath and take a step foreward.

Most of us have a three monthly check up bloods etc, and maybe hormone treatment like I’ve been on since day one. It’s time to have some fun, he must be relieved after six months, I was, your bond is strong between you both, just carry on as normal, ok you know what’s happened you can never alter that, it’s just being there for each other and enjoying each others company.

He like all of us know the stress it puts our partners under, mine wants to wrap me in cotton wool, hope you both enjoy the holiday, it’s good to get away and breath air that is different relieves the stress.So have a good time and we’re always here if you want to chat.

Stay Safe

Joe

Many thanks Shar. We are going on a British Isles Cruise with Ambassador. Really looking forward to it, but feeling apprehensive which I hope will settle down in time.

Many thanks Joe. Your advice is very much appreciated. 

To be honest I feel more relaxed going on a cruise than a land based holiday abroad. We are going to Cyprus next year to a hotel we have been to so many times but that is causing more anxiety than the cruises. 

Many thanks Brian. Your words are very much appreciated. Yes, I need to try and get on with it but I am a born worrier and it is so difficult. I try to keep busy but at the end of the day I still worry about the future and outcome especially when the Oncologist tells you it’s not curable but hopefully manageable. 

Many thanks Worried Wife. I completely agree with you, but it is a constant worry especially when the Oncologist appointment is coming up and I pray so much for a good result. I know my husband’s diagnosis is not curable but hopefully manageable. When I spoke with the Samaritans, she suggested that the reason I am feeling anxious is because the last 8 months we have been on a treadmill what with (like a lot of us) chemotherapy, radiotherapy etc and now things are settling down (I hope) and our life is getting back to some type of normality, this is why I’m feeling like I do. I really do hope you will be able to go on an amazing holiday for your Golden Wedding Anniversary. We are off on a British Isles Cruise with Ambassador and it will be our 39th Wedding Anniversary whilst we are travelling. 

Take care xx 

Hi Lynne - I know just where you are at. It's a cancer that we mere men put up with but it's shared with our partner and the diagnosis ripples through the family and we forget how it affects everyone - yes we have the cancer but it is you who worry, look after us and at the end of the day pick up the pieces.

I know Lorraine (Mrs Millibob) confided in the children who are all adults when I was in hospital (she's a retired nurse) that things didn't look too good for me - but I am one of the lucky ones. A Gleason 9 but on curative treatment.

There's hope though - even if the Oncologist says it's incurable - treatments these days are good and most people who are incurable live a long and happy life plus there are new treatments in the pipeline.

Keep busy - get those holidays sorted - you will be right - plus they are a good group on here, you can always find someone to chat to - and I know I can be serious but I do find sometimes with cancer you have to have a sense of humour to get through those "dark days" when it's all going wrong.

Stick with it - you are doing well - talking about the problems is half the battle.

Best wishes

Brian.