New here

He is 56 

I have only known i even had cancer for 4 weeks.  First of all this panic you feel is completely normal.  Its okay to feel like that.  my husband took the news badly.  I had a w.onderful career,but miy background is mental health.  I resigned from the job i loved tocare for parents both of whom were dieing but nothing cancer related.  So now im on the opposite side.  It was hard, it was really hard.  It was scary, i thought i could do it all better. so refusedall help.  mistake, I denied them the opportunity of making them feel better.  Only at the very end did i relent because i was  burnt out. Take a step back, be kind to yourselves and allow yourselves the time and space to come to terms with this.  If and when you are ready allow others to help, no time limit for how long this will take and definately no right and wrong.  In my experience it  is far far harder to watch...I think I am nearly through it, but who knows and in truth there are still times when i cry.  I wasnt prepared for how things could change so quickly but they can and frequently do.  I though am an optimist but a realist.  so you are going to have to wait t.,ill next Feb to see if it works,  Who the hell wouldnt be terrified!  Patients are tougher than you think, He will find a way to deal with that and for you its probably going to be more difficult.  But you will get there, i promise.  So be kind to yourselves and patient too.  You are more than welcome to contact me anytime if i can help i will, but like i said there no right or wrong so if you dont wish too that is also fine.  Everyone here understands that.  So for now i will wish you your husband and family all the luck and love in the world and hope i have been at least a little bit of  support Jill aged 59 x

Hi and welcome!

What the consultant has indicated is not unusual. We are all different, but I had 37 sessions of RT and 2 years of HT. The hospital now want 6 monthly blood tests ( I think) for a couple of years, followed by annual tests for life. So, from one test to another, I will never know whether its worked - some may see this as being negative, but I just take things as they come.

So my feeling is, don't fret over how long it's all taking, as it sounds normal for PC.

It would help us if you can share more of his details with us - staging for example.

Hope this helps.

Regards

Stuart

Hello and welcome - you have taken one of the first steps joining us here - there are plenty of us in the same boat and Prostate Cancer like all other cancers is a waiting game - you are always waiting for appointments, treatment or results,

Your husband is well into his treatment plan and he is already on the HT/RT path which with his Gleason score, and with the PC being in the lymph nodes is being given as a curative treatment. I have the same diagnosis - with a higher Gleason score and my treatment has been given as "with the aim to cure", (You can see my journey by clicking on the icon of the beach).

As Scampidoodle as said above, now you have to wait for results, my first PSA/Results is not until August when I am hoping for a low(ish) PSA number. I then go onto life long 6 monthly/annual tests.

So you are on the treatment path, by all means ask questions, but don't let PC get the better of you - enjoy life to the full, I know there is anguish and worry but he's a young 56 and there's plenty more life left in the old dog yet - enjoy it and put the PC to the back of your mind As I said he's on the treatment path. I hope this helps.

Keep in touch and if you have questions ask them, as a group we are more than happy to help.

Kind Regards - Brian.

Hi Helberg 

Sorry to hear, know it is a great shock initially.

Presume that he's on hormones for about a year so won't be possible to know about success of RT until HT stops.

Hopefully he will be given PSA tests every few months just to monitor.

What was the PSA before treatment.

Best wishes

Steve 

Hello Herbert, the shock of the diagnosis and the tests and the waiting……it’s almost too much to bear at times. I have never been so frightened or cried so much as I have done since we got my husbands diagnosis last September!  

now, though, he’s 4 weeks after completing radiotherapy and seems more settled on hormone therapy. We are slowly picking up the threads of life again. He will have his first PSA test in June and then 6 monthly for 5 years. Hormone therapy will continue until May next year.

this whole thing has brought so many ‘shifts’ in our lives and I think , although the diagnosis and treatment have not been welcome, there have been positives!  My husband has always been the practical one, the person who can mend anything, put everything right, be the stable force behind my dreams, my rock. Suddenly he became vulnerable, in need of my support, tired, old… this was such a shock! But, I now realise that I can get through dark times and can survive. I know now that he’s so very precious to me and it’s time for him to be ‘cherished’. It’s been a wake up call! It’s no good thinking that we can do all the fun things at some undefined point in the future. That future has arrived! We have, hopefully, been given a chance of cure at best and bought some time at worst. Time, after years of working hard, to enjoy ourselves and each other.  

so, lots of positives coming out of the dark months we have just struggled through. Hang on to the fact that, as a couple, your relationship and your very way of being might alter and shift ( just as it has done , say, after other major changes in your lives) but it need not be the end of the world and the changes can be for the better for each of you personally and for you as a couple ( despite the side effects of the treatment!) there really is a chink of light at the end of the tunnel!

take heart from the very brave men who post about their troubles here. Take heart from the wives, daughters, partners who post here! Prostate cancer is not what we want to welcome into our lives but even if not curable the treatments make it very manageable for many years in most cases. You will get there! X

Yes I'd worked out this seems normal.  I start chemo tomorrows after a delay, because i was too unwell.  But fit to go now.  however in that time i had 2 RT scan showed the tumour had goone down , which can only be good.  couldnt have second scan too unwell.  4 chemo planned 3 weeks between 2 chemo 1 immuno over 4 hours.  scan after 1, 3,and 4 to see from there.  But a breakthrough yesterday with less pain and the ability to move again makes me think that the second tumour they found might now be responsive.  Like you I feel the only positive way forward is to take it as it comes as nothing is going to run totally fault free.  So ive come to terms with that a bit now and feel much better overall Jill

sorry - auto-correct changed your name for me!!!

Our stories share many similarities!

My husband was also 56 when the problem was raised and he was given his formal diagnosis in January '23 - a couple of weeks after his 57th birthday. His Gleason score was also 3+4=7 and he is also being treated at the Royal Surrey in Guildford. He has decided on surgery to remove his prostate and is booked in for the op this Saturday (15th April). He was not offered a PET scan, but had an MRI and a bone scan in addition to his biopsy - all at East Surrey hospital in Redhill. 

I wish you and your husband all the best in this scary journey and here's hoping our husbands come out the other side cured and relieved 

Jacqui