I thought i was in the clear but, I was wrong. I've been in remission since December 23, 2019. Just last month I went in for my routine 6 month bloodwork and, my ca125 came back at a 20.9. For the last 5 years it's been 3/4. So, naturally they sent me for a CT scan. I got a call about a week and a half later saying they found a couple nodules. I have the results in my health portal, it's just I'm afraid to look at them. I know it's back, it's just scary. I'm more scared now than I was the first time I was diagnosed. I'm staying strong for my boyfriend and family and that's hard. I want to scream, kick, hit something. Yell it's not fair. But then I think, I knew this would happen again it was just a matter of time. Time flew by. And I've done nothing. I go for a pet scan on the 19th and I'm hoping it's not that bad. I'm prepared to fight. At least this time I know what to expect, kinda.
Hi 797
I am sorry to hear that you have had some concerning results from your latest routine check up. It must be really difficult after being in remission for so long.
I understand that is is scary and that it is hard to look in your results portal. I wonder if it is worth giving your GP a call to see if they will talk to you over the phone about the results. Then, whatever they are, you have someone to talk them through with.
If it would help then consider giving the Macmillan Support Line a call first, just to talk through how you are feeling and the nurses may be able to give you an idea of what to expect. Feeling angry and scared and that it's just not fair sounds a very understandable reaction to me.
It sounds that you have some of the results back but it may not be until after the 19th that you get the clearer picture- until then we are here to offer support where needed.
Waiting for results to know for sure is always hard. it is difficult to focus on much else. When I have been waiting in the past I always tried to have the attitude to prepare for the worst but to hope for the best and that until I had all the facts and knew what would happen I would just try to carry on the best I could. So I kept to normal routines but also accepted that I would probably feel a whole range of emotions.
I wish you well for your PET scan and do please get in touch if we can help in the meantime.
Jane
