Hi all,
I have been reading through some of the posts on here and I have already found so much comfort and help, so thank you for that.
My Dad was diagnosed with penile cancer last year.
In October 2023 he was told surgery, a possible partial penectomy was needed. Unfortunately due to other medical conditions he had in the past (stroke 10 years ago, internal bleed and sepsis last year) one of the consultants he saw was unsure about if he should have the surgery because of complications that could arise during the op given his medical history, there was a lot of back and forth conversations between consultants about how long the surgery would take and what kind of anaesthetic he would be able to take and how long they could keep him under for etc.
So this put the fear of god into him and he decided not to go ahead with the surgery. In his mind, it wasn't worth the risk and he had potentially had this cancer for over 18 months and it hadn't changed but I think fear of another stroke was the big factor in his decision at the time and we nearly lost him last year due to an internal bleed because of his blood thinners, so there was a lot to consider.
Fast forward to now and the cancer has progressed.
He has to have a total penectomy in the next few weeks with The Christie Foundation, a scan to see if it has spread and then possibly another op on his lymph nodes in his groin.
So that's where we are and I suppose I am wondering if there is any advice for me and my Mum etc as to how we can help him through this.I just feel helpless and so lost.
I know everyone is different and although my Dad isn't the most open with his feelings, we have been through so much with him medically that there isn't an issue with us talking about the ins and outs of his body so there are no problems there, but he's very much a "I'm fine" kind of guy when it comes to how he is feeling.
Also, is there anything I can get him for after the surgery? Anything we might need, I read a post about going to the toilet after the surgery etc and how difficult that can be so really, any advice you give us would be greatly appreciated.
I have so many questions, I just feel so lost as to how to help him and I just want to be prepared and be able to help him through this in any way I can.
His sister died of ovarian cancer and we lost my cousin (his niece) to breast cancer last year as it spread quickly through her body I know that's on my mind a lot so no doubt it is going through his too, I know that's not logical but I can't help but fear the worst. (Not that I would show him that!)
Thank you so much for listening.
Hi Jay87 and a very warm welcome to the online community which I hope you'll find is both an informative and supportive place to be.
While you're waiting for replies, it would be great if you could put something about your dad's diagnosis and treatment to date into your profile as it really helps others when replying to you and also when looking for someone on a similar pathway. It also means that you don't have to keep repeating yourself. To do this click on your username and then select 'Profile'. You can amend it at any time and if you're not sure what to write you can take a look at mine by clicking on my username.
"Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"
