My Name is Dormah and just a few short weeks ago I was as fit as anybody really...anyway my other half said to me that I had a yellow eye, I sort of laughed and went to look in the mirror, but when I looked I saw nothing yellow, but when I looked a couple of days later both of my eyes had turned yellow, so we called the local surgery for advice.......their advice was “ hang up the phone and dial 999, this in turn sent alarm bells ringing in my head......I thought fuck what do I do now......so I drove myself to the local hospital told them everything, and they admitted me........I was in hospital for two or three days.... then I got realeased from hospital, but I already knew too much, they said on the ct scan they could not see any spread anyware but there was a lump in my pancreas blocking my bile duct, turning me yellow my bilirubin level was over 5 times higher than what it should be, it was at 250 instead of 40......none of the nurses could see the sense of looking it up, but I am more of a reality head, I know you can you can not beat the facts.....a couple of days later I went back to the hospital cause they only gave me 3 days worth of vit K, they looked me up on the computer but found nothing, almost like I had never been there, they said best to get hold of my GP, then the ball will start rolling, after fighting back my tears and explaining to the nurses everything I knew,I got referred to Southampton General Hospital....They said that it looks like they can take the cancer away, but I would have to undergo the Whipple procedure so I started my reasearch again, I was shocked to find out that I was going for an 8 hour operation, I already knew every complication that arises from this procedure but sad to know that it only works on less than 10% of sufferers... scared I ran away from hospital and went home...5:00pm, the hospital phoned me up at about 11:30pm wondering where the hell I am, I told them I ran away, ripped my cannula out cause I was scared, but I was now more yellow than ever my bilirubin was now at over 450, they in turn told me that if I did not go back the the hospital then I would be DEAD by the weekend, so I went back, they said if you come back by tomorrow night then they would treat me as I had never left, I turned up the following day as agreed, load more bloods covid tests and such like. Couple more days passed, due to have operation, they gave me urgent MRI scan of my liver.......an hour or so later they all came to my bed to tell me that that cancer had now spread to my liver, and my few years life expectancy had now dropped to mere months, I already knew what they were gonna say before they said it, surgery now not an option because of spread...they fitted me with an internal stent to bypass the bilirubin, I am now home, not yellow, my eyes are back to normal ish, but my problem still persists.I am not gonna have any chemotherapy or anything, it really breaks my heart for my 8 children from 3-18 years
