How did you find out you had cancer??

Let me know how you come on... I have been referred to oncologist via my go as found small lump in my neck?? It's such a worry to think what treatment they will give if any at all...

It’s so difficult to not let it all run away in your head!! I have just been to my cousins for a couple of days and stayed up late, even drank some champagne and started to feel like I was just living my normal life, it’s been  so good to not be thinking about symptoms and what the future holds. I’m wrecked now of course and not feeling great but it was so worth it, haha. Hoping there’s a clear road to sorting this lump out for you, take care and do as many nice things as you can manage to take your mind off it for a spell. I struggle all of the time trying to tell myself not to worry about what you don’t know for sure but it’s one hell of an ask when you have cancer!! X

Hi

I have been to see oncologist today after agreeing with surgical consultant last week that maybe surgery is the best answer for now,and chemo would be the best step forward for now, to be told that it's palliative chemo, so shrinkage not cure, I feel like I've been hit with another bus, myself and my daughter both thought the chemo would clear the tumors but this is not so. So it will be back after going through these blasts of chemo, 

As much as I know we should be living our best life I just can't and this train wreck is so hard to cope with

Hope you both get the answers you need

Take care pam

1. Hi Pam

I am so so sorry to read your message.

Words seem so inadequate.

We all try to keep ourselves up and like you say living your best life or taking every day and making the most of it is all very well but the reality of what you’ve been told is hideous. I think that despite being told we have advanced cancer with modern medicine and people telling you positive stories of miraculous recoveries we just want to believe it will all be ok. I was told in the beginning it would be more keeping it at bay not a cure but I’m still struggling with the possibility it is back already, makes me feel that putting myself through all of the chemo and surgery and meds that made me feel awful hasn’t been for much gain. Maybe all this stuff just prolongs our agony and I’ve certainly felt like the stress of it all could kill me before the cancer!!!!!

Really struggling to say something to make you feel better, in reality I know I can’t, just know I am thinking about you as are all of the people you know and let your family wrap themselves around you and feel their love

I hate the fact that I'm putting my family through this again, and I know none of us signed up for it.

I'm hoping in a few days when the info has processed in my own head that I will be able to move on a bit, I don't actually have a date to start chemo yet. Waiting for the unit to contact me.

I didn't bother with a wig or head covering last time, I live I nottingham and we get a voucher towards a wig worth £75 I think and a list of businesses that accept them, not sure what to do, as my sister gets married in Sept around the time of my last cycle and I don't want to ruin her wedding photos. But I struggle with a hat never mind a wig, 

I will be having my hair cut short soon as chemo is arranged as I have a mid length Bob and nothing worse than getting long hairs in your food.

Take care pam

Hey! You go girl!! Late nights champas, how fabulous! You are so right about not worrying until there is something to worry about.. I also have times when I haven't thought I'm a cancer survivor/fighter, what's next, I think I thought I'm going to be that woman who lives for ages and has a fairlytale story, hopefully still will.. ours isn't to question why we got this horrendous disease, which is really the worst, stripping us of so much, hair etc., but we all seem to find strength from somewhere to carry on, . We all probably do have days that change, some of hope some of hopeless, that's to be expected, .. we are indeed true warrior us Teal ladies.. much love and positive vibes!

Sorry I hadn’t seen your response, I’m not finding this site very user friendly, or I’m just hopeless!!!

I find I’m like you in that I need a few days to process and then I calm down a bit, it’s just all rubbish:(

I didn’t wear a wig either, the hair going wasn’t great but I found the eye brows and lashes were the worst bit.

im pretty certain your sister will far from think your spoiling anything and will be grateful that you are at her wedding. I struggled with even the scarfs but I think for a wedding you could go over the top and have a big bow that went with your dress or outfit, some make up and false lashes and you could look great

I have my scan on Saturday and have gone from fretting and am now trying to have a nice time before they tell me anything bad!!!!

Take care of yourself and do as many nice things to pamper yourself before the gruelling chemo starts!

x 

Hi Disney

I'm the same don't think the site is user friendly although I'm not very tech savvy either.

Have you got any symptoms other than your ca125.

Hope everything goes well for you on Saturday fingers crossed.

Pam

Hi

Hoping you are feeling a bit calmer about everything

I feel like I’m getting abdominal pain and tummy making a lot of noise which it did for the year before I was diagnosed. I’ve spent months trying not to worry about every pain I was getting  and now don’t know if I’m imagining it’s worse or that I’m just focused on it so much. Then I think if I’m just imagining it’s worse I still have a rising ca125 so somethings going on!! Just watched the Deborah James documentary which was a bit sobering when you have cancer but  I was thinking that between all of her treatments and times of feeling so poorly she was then running and so fit!! I can hardly run up the stairs, or is that coz she was 35 and I was 60 when diagnosed??!!

Sunny up here today, hope it was at yours, make sure you get out in the fresh air, I think it helps to clear your head

x

My sister watched that on Monday, I'm not very mobile, I don't have very good core strength, and the 3 hernias give me extreme back ache so I have to do everything a bit at a time, the lymphodema in my left leg so that also get very heavy.

I have started getting a few abdo pains, and my tummy is very very noisy too. I'm eating OK but get the bloated feeling after eating.

Hope you get things sorted

Weather nice n dry bit breezy good for drying the washing

Pam