Pleural Biphasic Mesothelioma and Atrial Fibrillation

Hello Shezina 

A warm welcome to the Macmillan Online Community although I am so sorry to find you here. I am Brian one of the Community Champions here at Macmillan. Although I have a different cancer I noticed your post has gone unanswered. I can't answer it myself however by me replying it will be "bumped up" to the top of the group and I hope be seen by other group members and replied to.

As you are looking after your husband it might be an idea to also join the carers only group too, here's the link

Carers only forum 

You will find plenty of help and support there too.

I hope the above helps, if I can do anything else for you please don't hesitate to let me know.

Best wishes - Brian.

Thank you Brian, that's kind of you. Truth is I feel quite low about our experience with cancer, as a family and how we were told about my husbands condition. Its been quite a hard almost nine months. took so long to find out what was wrong. I feel quite sorry for what has happened to him and others with cancer. He is able, so I am getting back into work. I am not a carer but do give him healing and try to help as much as possible. I think I likely need some type of counselling. We all think we know what others are going through but we don't. It's so individual, so painful. So, I think working is my answer to this. 

thank you for your kind guidance. many warm wishes 

Hi Shezina so sorry to hear about your husbands diagnosis with this awful disease, my husband passed away in May last year at 65 after a 19 month battle He didn’t have any problem with AF so can’t comment on that, he did have two rounds of immunotherapy which he was fine with he had no side effects but unfortunately it didn’t work for him but does for some people as I’ve read on here . I understand your feeling as it does make you feel so helpless and angry that this should not have happened and if you feel therapy would help you then give it a try.I hope your husband has the best possible outcome with his treatment . 

Good Morning Shezina 

Thank you for your reply. I am so sorry to read about your husbands diagnosis. My father in law worked with asbestos for years and I do know how it causes untold health issues. Sadly the NHS isn't the best at delivering a cancer diagnosis too - may members on my Community (Prostate Cancer) get told they have cancer in a telephone call - that's not right!!

Keeping busy does help to take your mind off cancer - and I totally agree, only people with a diagnosis and their loved ones understand cancer and even then we all have a different "journey" - but it is a "bond" that holds us together.

Cancer affects one in two people now and 50% of those and their partners struggle with mental health issues so some form of counselling would I think be beneficial. Even talking on here relieves some of the stress and helps - I know when I have had my "dark days" I have come online and admitted I was down - sharing the burden is a great help sometimes.

Best wishes - Brian.

Thank you Brian for that very insightful reply. I agree with all you have said. I think I need counselling. I am not coping at all and feel unwell. So I will try and fix something even if it is online. Thank you again for sharing your experiences, it does help, although I feel so sad for the way people are treated. Bless you, Brian and thank you again. Suzi 

Thank you Bey.

I am very sorry you lost your husband last May. No one knows how devastating it is to lose those we love. I am struggling with this and its making me ill so I have to attend to it. We are so linked that I pick up what he feels. Too sensitive, something I have worked on most of my adult life to overcome. I think we all say how sorry we are and it feels so little to offer when the most important person in our life has transitioned. We miss touch, to talk, to feel together. There is so much in this physical world that draws us into life and love. Thank you so much for sharing. I realise it can be very painful to share so sending you love and care. Suzi 

Hello Suzi (Shezina) 

Working as a Community Champion we have access to some resources so if you don't mind here are a few ideas for you:

* Have you spoken to your GP about your feelings and emotions, they can sometimes help?

* Our local Macmillan Centres around the UK offer emotional support and some have access to other services. To find your local Centre and other local centres where help may be available, try this link : In Your Area. You are welcome to contact the fabulous people on the Support Line too 0808 808 00 00 (8am to 8pm 7 days a week).

* Do you have a Maggie's centre near you. This is a national cancer support charity where you can just drop in got a brew and a chat - details here - Maggie's.

* BCAP (British Association For Counselling & Psychotherapy) is an online directory where you can find accredited counsellors - 01455 883300 or www.bacp.org.uk.

I do hope you can find something suitable - if you need anything else just drop me a line - I am always around on the Community (probably with "my flock" on the Prostate Group).

Kind Regards - Brian.