Hi im new, struggling with moms cancer she also has copd so at min there nothing Dr's can do( treatment ) she is very frail, not eating or drinking, she seems like she has given up, we lost my dad 5 years ago and it not getting any easier for her she wants to be with him again. I have had her staying with us for almost 3 weeks with no help from my bro or sis, she wants to go home now so community care people who have been totally amazing have got her hospital bed coming Thursday, I feeI need a rest as it's been really hard for me. I have heart failure 
and I thought I was having heart attack as pain was bad., I ain't thank God, is it bad to say I need a rest. i have had to help her up when she has fallen over. Mom also has macular degeneration and has seizures charles bonnet syndrome, the things she sees hallucinating and says to.me is sometimes evil.
My daughter who has disabilities as seen her nan crying in pain, needs help moving around etc and it's hard on her too. Thank you xx
Hi DonnieO24
Welcome to our community, perhaps the best club nobody ever wanted to join.
Having more than one issue does complicate things. my wife's cancer has quite a lot of mets in her lungs and for her she had a complication of having a lung collapse so I can relate on not jumping in to treatment.
One thing I found helpful was the page on your feelings when someone has cancer being able to recognize the emotions as normal helped to to find them less overwhelming. I did a living with less stress course that helped me to recognize that putting lots of energy in to worrying about a future I could not control was stopping me from appreciating what we have.
It can take a while to get our minds around what the world is in our new normal.
<<hugs>>
Steve
