Dad

Hi Puppy mumma, welcome to the group, but so sorry to hear about your dad. This is a very worrying time for you, I know, and I can understand that you just want the treatment to start. I would think that things have been more complicated with your dad being diagnosed with 2 different cancers. That is 2 lots of tests that need to be carried out, and 2 lots of oncology teams to discuss a treatment plan. Having said that if he found out about this in August, that is a long time to wait! 

Have they told him that they need to treat the lung before they can treat the bowel? 

Hi mine took forever to start treatment , found in. Feb surgery in May chemo in August .   Your dad would have been allocated a nurse specialist and given a number so you could contact them and ask for an update . I found out everything was done in 2 weeks . 2 weeks to see respiratory . 2 weeks for breathing tests . 2 weeks for a pet scan . 4 weeks for surgery and it this waiting period that is the killer .   You could ask for more information as to what the treatment plan  is .   Please try to look after yourself  to . 

Hi Chelle, thank you for the reply.  It has absolutely been complicated by the revelation of a second cancer and this has definitely prolonged the process.  

He has indeed needed two lots of tests and 2 MDT's with specialties at different hospital trusts as ours doesn't do thoracic surgery.  

Yes we have been told they won't touch the bowel until the lung is sorted as that takes priority.

Appointment has been moved and is now next Friday so we will hopefully have a more solid plan then

Hi, thank you for your response!  I hope your treatment has been going as well as possible!  Dad does have a lung cancer nurse and she is amazing, I touch base with her fairly regularly (it helps that I bump into her in the corridor at work too) she always asks how I am as well as how Dad is.

I am looking after myself too as I know how important tlit is that I am well in order to support Mum and Dad.  Luckily we have a fantastic employee assistance program so I am in a better position than some.

If I am honest the worst part was waiting for diagnosis which we got about 3-4 weeks ago.  Having a treatment plan will help too... 

I hope you are looking after yourself too.  I really am finding the online community helpful 

Hello Puppy mama, I hope you are keeping well. I also have a parent who has recently been diagnosed with lung cancer. My mum is stage 4 (although they have not told her that) and so frightened.  

I have felt like a bit of a fraud when I first posted. I suppose because it's not me who this is directly affecting and you are the first, other not directly affected, person on here that I feel an affinity to. 

I'm worried about my mum. I'm worried about how this will affect my children who are both young, but old enough to be affected.  I'm worried that I have to take time to get to london to support mum but that means I have to rely on support from.my husband and mother in law. I'm worried my  brother, who lives in the uk, will.think I'm.leaving it all to him and his family. 

Mostly I'm worried about mum and how she is coping.

I hope your dad will be ok. I hope you will be able to cope.  I hope I will.be able to cope.  

Here if you need a.release valve. 

Bell1. Hx

Morning Bell1

So sorry to hear that about your Mum's diagnosis!  The emotions that come with the diagnosis of someone close are both wide ranging and difficult.

One of the things I have found most difficult is the feeling of complete powerlessness.  From reading on here and on the friends and family forum is that these feelings are not unique to my situation.  If you have not yet found the friends and family forum I highly recommend it.

It must be difficult being so far away from Mum at this time!  I am very lucky that I live only a mile away from my parents.  Trying to guide your children through this must be heart-wrenching, thankfully my fur babies are blissfully unaware. 

I hope you have friends local to you that you feel able to approach.  I would also recommend Mum's lung cancer nurse if you are not already in contact with them; they are a fantastic resource!  

I am pleased my post has made you feel like you can reach out in here!  Other posts did similar for me... I am a total newbie myself but had been on several times and seen the shared stories... in the end I decided to brave a post and I am so pleased I did.

Please feel free to respond at any time.. I will reply as soon as I see the notification - not sure if you are in the same time zone from your reply... I think as family we do feel fraudulent in our feelings.  It is a difficult inner turmoil!  

Remember to look after you too

I think everyone is surprised by how much "hurry up and wait" is involved in cancer diagnosis and treatment.

Like your dad, I had two primary cancers - non-Hodgkin lymphoma and non-small cell lung cancer.  I was not formally diagnosed with lung cancer until after I had finished treatment for lymphoma, and wouldn't have even known about the existence of the lung cancer if it weren't for the lymphoma.

Many of us have had a lobectomy, so as you find out more information we can help you put it into context.  As you're probably aware, there are a lot of different tests in the lead up to treatment.

Well today is our first appointment with the surgeon... I'm just going over my list of questions and hoping I'm not missing anything...

Yes the hurry up and wait is awful!!  I hope you are doing ok now... sounds like you had a complex journey! 

Well back to my questions list and research...