Hello I'm new

hi Chris ,sorry no one has replied that can be more helpful than me ,i had a lobectomy last year ,so i cannot help with the things you are going through ,but i am sure someone will come along to help ,you sound as though you are doing ok 

Hi ya, My wife has non-small cell lung cancer, stage 3b. Last Autumn she had a scan because of a swollen stomach, which also revealed a shadow on her lung. A biopsy confirmed cancer. They mentioned surgery then, but she was more concerned about her stomach, so she had a hysterectomy December 2022, fibroids. Now her lung tumour is 10cm and forms a lump by her left arm pit.  The oncologist recommended radiotherapy, chemo and immunotherapy. But so far she has refused these, believing that Black Seed Oil and other natural treatments will cure her. She said that the biopsy hurt her, and the petscan, and she is afraid  the radiotherapy etc will burn her, and cause more harm. She also blames me for her condition, saying that if we had gone to live in her home country of Romania, none of this would have happened. I'm at my wits end, I have a catheter in, because of an enlarged prostrate, and my PSA is 10. 

                                                                    Miskondibe

I’m so sorry to hear this, I think your wife is feeling very afraid and overwhelmed and that is why she is blaming you.

it is concerning she is refusing treatment and thinking alternative therapy will help, unfortunately there is little evidence these treatments work and the people who peddle them are exploiting people’s fears. 

you need to get someone to talk to your wife, macmillan may be able to help or your GP. You also need support, call the helpline and speak to them.

remember your wife is terribly afraid and doesn’t mean to be hurtful. 

Greendeco13, Thank you for your kind words, and please forgive me for answering so late. The wife of a friend who has undergone chemo and radiotherapy has spoken with my wife today, but don't think it will do much good.