Post op stress and anxiety

Hi Mark,

Me too, sort of. This survival thing is weird. We go though a period of thinking we are going to die, cope with that as best we can (I found denial was really good!) and then there's this big anti-climax when we're still alive and they are telling us about regular scans for the next 5 years. I've got 5 years? I had got all my coping mechanisms set up for 5 months... On top of that I'm painfully aware that most of the people reading this would give anything to be where I am - what on earth am I thinking and what kind of ingrate am I? And of course we've got 5 years of scans when it could all go horribly wrong again at any time.

It is all something of a mind-f***. I don't think we'd be normal if we just shrugged it all off and carried on like nothing had happened. We're dealing with major stress unwinding itself in our minds. Different people will react differently, but things will get better - that's how the mind works.

I'm a few months further along than you (my lobectomy was in January). My breathing is still improving, but I'm still out of breath more often than I'd like - I'm starting to think it might be permanent, but that's fair as I've less lung than I used to have. The people I know think I'm completely back to normal the way I used to be - they don't see me having to rest after walking up the stairs that I used to jog up.

kind regards
Steve

Hi Steve, thanks for taking the time to respond.

So it’s not just me then 

so many emotions so much panic and despair. It’s taking a lot to try and keep on top of it.

BUT there is hope, the lobectomy was a great success apparently and hopefully 5 years of checks will only be that.

We have so many comrades within the online community here who aren’t so lucky and my heart goes out to them.

people l know conversationally have said I shouldn’t be trying to return to my job but that was my goal. Yesterday my gp signed me off long term. “ if your job isn’t having your bum on a chair you can’t do it”  his quote.

I’m on mirtazapine 45mg a day now so I hope it will help get my mood back up.

Unfortunately also yesterday yet another chest infection so more antibiotics plus a new pill.. steroids 

I am hoping the breathing may still improve but with the underlying conditions I will probably have to accept a much smaller improvement.

mark

Hi the Markthecook

Im sad to read your set back but I am not surprised I think it’s normal.

Be kind to yourself, just do what you feel like and if you need a quiet day that’s fine a good day you can celebrate 

I had a six hour bowel cancer op August 2021 and by the end of November I didn’t get up every morning shouting I am lucky to be alive 

Then I felt bloody guilt for not jumping for joy. I phoned my GP who gave me serotonin after a month a literal black cloud lifted  then I got the call back no one wants. Lung cancer 

So again I should be jumping for joy as they operated and good margins blah blah.blah 

But as I type this my breathing isn’t great. I now have allergies, only discovered when I went to Spain and my chest was amazing. Truly amazing. I can’t live in Spain though my bro could sort it as my Hubbys got Parkinson’s , NAFLD and a heart condition 

Blimey I’m gonna get my little violin out in a mo. 

Anyway I’m sorry if I’ve made you feel worse but wanted you to know that your reaction normal.
Try and plan something nice to do at least once a week 

Mine was breakfast club. Thursday mornings are great 

I hope the happy pils do their magic. 

Sending you a virtual hug 

Hey Ann

thanks for comments. They lifted my spirits and left me smiling and helped get me through a naff day so much at 9 30pm I am feeling pretty good. A wee cake just for you

Yummy. 
And it’s fat free. 
perfect 

You take care and chat anytime.