I have a rare, very aggressive neuroendocrine cancer that has metastasized to the liver. I finished chemo in May, which stabilized the liver lesions temporarily but the expectation is that they will proliferate again within a short period. I'm 60, with a grown daughter and no partner. I have a sister who lives far away who has nevertheless been a great support, though we were estranged for many years. I have a good number of friends and cousins who have made many offers of help and who I spend time with as social distancing allows..
When I was diagnosed (the cancer was an incidental finding found after emergency surgery for a small bowel perforation) in January 2020, I had to give up my two jobs. It just wasn't possible to do them and go through treatment. Giving up my jobs was the hardest part of this whole thing and I fear taking on a new job (or one of the old ones) because I can't be sure how long I'll be able to do it.
The chemo was rough but I have worked hard to regain my strength. I don't need help with daily tasks and have begun volunteering in a couple of places that are meaningful to me and that satisfy my need to be occupied with work. So far, my symptom level is low enough so that no pain medications are needed. I do have trouble sleeping, but I find that the more active I am physically, the less this is a problem.
The uncertainty and sudden sea change in my life cause me a lot of anxiety. I do find that one has to be careful with how much to express to others. I have a therapist that I talk with on occasion and practice relaxation techniques with and this helps somewhat.
Is anyone else out there going through this on their own? How do you manage your anxiety while facing the reality of the disease?.Looking for wise words if you have them. Thank you.
