Feeling totally overwhelmed after Kidney cancer diagnosis

The op is definitely under a general anaesthetic and goes so quickly! I had my op on Saturday and apparently only took an hour! The anaesthetists were so lovely asking me about my work etc and think of something nice and felt like minutes when I came too. Have faith in the professionals, they’ll look after you very well. 
Try and keep busy until the date of the op too x 

That’s amazing!!! X 

I’m Cambridgeshire! X 

How are you feeling today? Are you still in hospital?

Op Saturday and home Sunday night! I’m sore around the wound area and feel wiped out but painkillers are helping and I’m sleeping better too. I’m sure I’ll feel better everyday. I’m just not going to push anything and take all the time I need to recover x 

Just wanted to add to this that you definitely don't have to feel positive about all this! There is an article on the Macmillan website about Toxic Positivity which I found really helpful when trying to navigate the people around me's optimism.

That being said, my actual surgery went really well. Clearly everyone's experience is different, but I was up and walking on the same day, and only needed paracetamol and ibuprofen for a few days afterwards. The information leaflet will give you a massive range of things that MIGHT happen, but they will also tell you this when you sign your consent form, so if it will stress you out then there's no pressure to read it.

Macmillan offer counselling if the anxiety is becoming an issue (https://www.macmillan.org.uk/cancer-information-and-support/get-help/emotional-help/bupa-counselling-and-emotional-well-being-support)

I had mine done at the Christie (Manchester area)

I live in Hull 

Totally agree. I'm trying to be positive as I cannot wallow in my self pitty, however you have to try and be positive... it's hard sometimes... these are some of the comments I've had since returning to work

1. oh well you're ok now, move on, be positive!!
2. it wasn't that bad of a cancer I suppose!!!

3. you're looking so well, you don't even look like you've had anything!!!! (This one's not too bad) 

however with all those throw away comments, I have had to hold myself together and hold my tongue... and also not get upset!! Some people really don't think!!! However if it was any of them, id never dream of saying those things EVER! 

The worst is I'm sorry I just don't know what to say. And then they avoid you. I feel different already and it's early days. I suppose I was guilty in the past of making those type of comments. I will definitely think more from now on when speaking to people who have had a diagnosis.

When I was first telling people (seems like ages ago but only a few months!), someone gave me the tip to tell the person what you want from them. E.g. I've got cancer, the way you can help me get through this would be - by sending me jokes regularly/ meeting up with me for coffee to talk about something different/ letting me vent about how unfair everything is without offering solutions.

I found it really helped as people just don't know how to react to such horrible news, and it gives them something helpful to do that actually works for how you're feeling.