Hi,
I have somewhat of a long, complicated health history. Because of this, surgery is very risky. This year, I had to have surgery to remove a gallstone that was blocking my colon, I think. It was killing me wherever it was, so I had to have the surgery or that would have been me.
I ended up sending a week in intensive care, and was asked to sign a DNR as soon as I was conscious (I’m 57. I refused).
Anyway, the cancer story goes like this, dates are a little hazy, so might not be totally accurate.
Two years ago, roughly, I collapsed at home. Twice. In the middle of the night. My wife thought I was dying, so it was bad, but she called an ambulance who did an ECG and decided I was having another heart attack (I’ve had 2 already). After a fair amount of prodding, poking and inserting of sharp things, they decided that I had Pancreatitis ( turns out the collapse was due to very low blood pressure, and it has happened again).
The consultant looking after me was one of those who have no time for his patients, to be fair, he was useless. A recurring theme at my local hospital.
He ordered a CT scan, and this clearly showed a Tumor on my left kidney. He missed this and I didn’t find out until I entered the bowel cancer screening Programm a full year later.
I have now seen the urologist who looked me in the eye, and with a lot of empathy told me I had kidney cancer, showed me an image of it and apologised that it had been missed by the gasterenterologist.
I was told that surgery wasn’t an option due to my other health issues, not even a biopsy.
Now, I am sure my issue is one that many in this position would love to have. Apparently, my cancer is slow growing. I was told that 6-monthly scans with follow-up telephone appointments would be the way forward - active monitoring I think they called it. So far, I’ve had a couple of scans, no follow up calls and 1 letter. They are now going to scan annually as the growth is very slow, but my issue is this: they won’t write it down. Because there has been no biopsy, and because it is slow growing, they won’t officially diagnose me. They have told me point blank that I have cancer, but won’t commit to paper.
This leaves me in limbo. I don’t know if this will kill me, or how long this would likely take if it will kill me. I have not much idea of what would be the options if this started to grow, but I imagine it would be centred around morphine, probably lots of morphine.
I understand that my issue could be pretty unique, but is any one in a similar situation? Is there anyone with any idea how long this slow growing would take?
I get that I should take what I have with a smile and be thankful, but it is quite difficult.
sorry for rambling.
Moss
