Just offloading here. Some of you may remember my previous posts
Hubby had a radical neck dissection for throat cancer a couple of years ago, and then was diagnosed in March with tongue cancer - delayed diagnosis due to phone consultations only during covid. We have four children, who were really scared at the recent diagnosis. He has had two tongue ops in April and June, and his tongue is looking good from a cancer point of view now.
Unfortunately he started getting neck, ear and sciatic hip pains about a month ago. GP did hip x-ray (all fine) and gave strong painkillers, and referred to ENT for syringing.
He was seen for tongue follow up on Wednesday (delayed by a few months due to covid), and almost didn't tell the Maxfax consultant how bad he was really feeling. Thankfully I was there, to add my tuppenceworth, and they offered for him to see an ENT doc and get ears stringed that afternoon. During the ENT consult, they looked down his nose and throad, and they found a "bobbly" area just above his larynx, which needs biopsying asap, and MRI.
Since his appointment Wednesday he has been getting more symptomatic of cancer, (difficulty swallowing, coughing gunk up, food / drink coming through his nose, tiredness - though he was initially on huge amounts of painkiller - neck pain and tightness, voice difficulty, reduced appetite and weightloss, and he thinks he will be back on that treadmill again. I do too. We are scared of what will happen next. We are battle weary from the previous two cancers and the prolonged recovery. Three times now, he has had to relearn to eat. Our children are 6, 9, 12 and 15, and it would be the most awful thing ever, to tell them that he has cancer again. Things are also tight financially - he starts a phased return to work next week after 6 months off, and we can't afford to drop to half his wage if he doesn't return then. I am just back at work after a few months at home looking after the family. In March we had hoped his critical illness insurance would support us, but it turns out it only pays out again after 5 years cancer-free (even though it was a different cancer).
Has anyone else had a journey like this? What can I be doing practically? Only a very few people know that he has had cancer again in March as he is a very private person, and hates me to talk about it, but talking through things helps me.
I have also posted an abridged version of this in the Friends & Family Forum.
Thankyou for listening xx
Hi Mumofmuggles. So sorry your update is one with such bad news. I can only offer sympathy and hugs as I have no personal experience of this. Both our other two Community Champs have had to have salvage surgery after recurrence but ar e thankfully well now. I know Mike is on holiday abroad but Chris is around and might pop on.
Macmillan might be able to guide you financially so have a look at this page link I've created HERE
You can look at the financial aspects of the help perhaps and also be able to speak to somebody from the team for support generally. They are really helpful.
Please let us know how he gets on. It's a terrible situation
Best wishes
Dani
Base of tongue cancer. T2N0M0 6 weeks Radiotherapy finished January 2019
I wrote a blog about my cancer. just click on the link below
https://todaymycoffeetasteslikechristmasincostarica.com
PS. I’ve found a free counselling service that Macmillan provide. That might be worth looking at
www.macmillan.org.uk/.../bupa-counselling-and-emotional-well-being-support
Dani
Base of tongue cancer. T2N0M0 6 weeks Radiotherapy finished January 2019
I wrote a blog about my cancer. just click on the link below
https://todaymycoffeetasteslikechristmasincostarica.com
Thankyou for your replies everyone. Hubby was told last Tuesday there there is definitely cancer near the voicebox, which can be seen on MRI. He is having a throat biopsy on Thursday, and PET the Tuesday coming. He is really tired, he is struggling to eat now, his voice sounds like he is being strangled. We know we are weeks off answers yet, but he is going downhill so quickly. The older children are really struggling with the news, and hubby is too. He think it's all over. The younger children don't yet know, though they can see that he is ill. It's so awful that he has cancer for a third time!!!
Oh Nat that us such awful news. At least they are straight on top of it. Have they mentioned the possibility of further surgery and/or immunotherapy? It’s probably not on the cards till they have all the scans and biopsies in
Ill tag chris2012
perhaps he can offer some support. His cancer returned twice and in the end he had a laryngectomy but is now well and enjoying his life.
Dani
Base of tongue cancer. T2N0M0 6 weeks Radiotherapy finished January 2019
I wrote a blog about my cancer. just click on the link below
https://todaymycoffeetasteslikechristmasincostarica.com
Good evening Nat, so sorry that i have not replied to your original post as its something i have gone through myself, sometimes its hard to accept when it returns and you are left wondering when will it end, it has all the symptoms of cancer with the tiredness and voice change, im sincerely hope once they get the results back they will act quickly to deal with the tumour and i think its something you must stress when you see them. When mine came back the third time it was on my voicebox/vocal cords and from what i remember i did not even have a biopsy as my consultant wanted straight away, he gave me two weeks to decide what i wanted to do as it could mean removing my voicebox, it took me two days to decide and i told him to go ahead with the operation and do what has to be done, once the started the operation they could see that they had to remove my voicebox. I must stress this is not the case all the time and they might be able to remove the tumour safely or they might go for radio/chemo if your husband has not had it before, so all the time there are options its a good sign that something can be done. If its any consolation once they removed the tumour inc my voicebox the cancer was halted, it was done in 2010 and i have had no comebacks touch wood. Plus it would not surprise me if the procedures have got better giving better results. It's definitely not all over until the fat cat sings, as the saying goes, so there is always hope. I will not say much more until you have the answers or proposals from your husband's team. Maybe wait until a bit later with the children as i had two at school at the time.
I do remember your first post as i remember you mentioning your finances again he/you should be looked after fairly well with befits and allowances until things improve, i still live on benefits as i cannot work anymore due to no speaking and other problems from previous operations with head and neck cancers.
Please come back if you need more help, guidance or just a chat, i know its worrying times but hang on in there, stay strong. Mike O had similar just recently and he seems to have got through it all fairly well and as i heard is abroad on holiday, can't be bad. Wishing you and the rest of your family all the best, you can do it, hubby 
, take care.
Chris xx
Its sometimes not easy but its worth it !
Thankyou all for your replies. His appointment was yesterday. I'm not ready to go into it all yet, but it's very aggressive, and the only option is chemo, would probably hasten his demise in his condition. We are all absolutely gutted. The kids especially are very upset, which is unbearable to see.
