Last treatment

Hi Doris,

I am sorry to hear about your Dad. I hope now he is allowing you to speak to professionals that this is helping you somewhat.

My Dad is currently in Tameside and has been for two weeks, he has a large tumour at the back of his throat which has spread to his tonsils and tongue, it is affecting his hearing and has no unsafe swallow so has been fitted with a feeding tube. The doctors have told us that there is nothing they can do at this point, he is too unwell to be out to sleep and there is a high chance he could bleed out if they were to try and do a second biopsy. We have been told he has months and his only treatment is palliative. I can understand how you feel, I am devastated and Dad is frightened made harder by the fact he is in hospital and we can't see him currently. We are hoping he will be home Monday so we can care for him and know he only has months left. We have been told that macmillan and palliative community care teams will help us. Sounds like we are experiencing similar things right now, sending my love to you and your family. Thanks 

Thanks for responding. I have been through all emotions angry, sad and wondering why him but i have started to have an acceptance mind and just try and keep him comfortable and be there for him as he is still refusing any home visits. The current situation is that he has not ate anything since a week gone thursday and is only having alcohol on a night and a coffee now and again. I managed to talk him in to trying the morphine patches which he has been on a couple of weeks (currently on 10 mg) but they aren't doing enough for him as when i asked him on a scale of 1 to 10 how bad the pain was the other day he said 23 in a grumpy voice which he has been for a while not that i can blame him, i just let it go over my head as i know he doesn't mean to. Im going to ring the doctor tomorrow to see if he can get stronger ones as im not sure if they have to be gradually increased. Theres been a few times now where his leg has gave way and has landed up falling the most recent one was saturday where i received a call from an hysterical mam, luckily they just live behind me so i went over and picked him up. As harsh as it sounds and although i love him to bits im more worried about the effect its having on mam as her anxiety is through the roof at the minute. I know he doesnt want to go in to a hospital or hospice and i respect that and to be honest i would rather he was at home but i just wish he would let us get help in.