Dad with head and neck cancer

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Hi there,

My dad was diagnosed with a head and neck cancer (HPV+) with an unknown primary four years ago. He had a radical neck dissection two years ago and it has now come back. He had a surgery to remove a cancerous lymph node a few months ago and now needs to do radiation. 

1. Does anyone have experience with not being able to find the primary? 

2. How should we prep for treatment? He is having radiation to his whole neck and I want to be prepared. 

Thank you!

S

  • Hi and welcome. Sorry about your father. It must be hard revisiting this all over again for both of you.

    We do have some members, one in particular who has had to deal with a recurrence after no primary was found. 

    I'm sure he will be along at some time to add his wise words but in the meantime if you click on his name here   it will take you to his profile where he has put down how his journey has been.

    My advice re preparation is to make sure your dad is as fit as can be. Some centres recommend that you fatten up a bit as weight loss can be considerable. I'm no too sure about this. I didn't lose much weight at all.

    Basically he is being treated by a team who does this every day and its good at it. Do as he's told. Take his pain killers by the clock when they become necessary and be kind to himself all the way through.

    RT is pretty powerful stuff. The side effects are awful but most of them are temporary. His radiographers are his point of contact to the rest of his support so do encourage him to tell them how he feels and what he needs every day.

    Is he having a feeding tube fitted? I had a nasogastric tube at four weeks because by that time I couldn't swallow even water.

    I had RT to both sides of my neck but a smaller dose to one side. I moisturised well every day and put lots of aloe vera gel on straight after treatment to help prevent burning. I just put my head down and got on with it. It's not easy but doable and five plus years later I am alive and well.

    Do stay with us. We can help when you need us

    Dani 

    Base of tongue cancer. T2N0M0 6 weeks Radiotherapy finished January 2019

    I wrote a blog about my cancer. just click on the link below 

    https://todaymycoffeetasteslikechristmasincostarica.com 

    Macmillan Support Line - 0808 808 00 00, 7 days a week between 8am-8pm

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  • Hi S

    Dani has really said it all.  Emotionally I was not too disapointed to finally have something we could really treat as I had been expecting this moment, but always hoped it was not going to happen.  I ended up with chemoradiation both sides as they really did not know what was happening with my cancer and wanted to cover all the bases.  That was mainly because it has come and gone over the last 5 years of it's own accord!

    I finished treatment in mid February this year.  Got the all clear PET in May and have had subsequent checks and all is OK.

    I've bounced back fairly well.  Now dry mouth is my main issue and that affects sleeping and eating.  I can taste most things, but only as a muted taste.  At least I know what I am eating.  Some foods I stear well clear of for the time being - spices and "solid" meats aside from chicken.  Each day I learn better how to live with the mew normal.

    As to the new normal...  I walk the dog miles each day and now fatigue is mainly past me have full days.  Currently  on our UK East Coast meander for 5 weeks.  A mix of self catering and eating out.  Enjoying every minute of it.

    It will be hard on your Dad.  I describe the treatment as brutal and the initial recovery phase as torture.  & months down the line I look back at it as a distant memory.

    Happy to tell you more if you wish.  Just ask.

    Peter
    See my profile for more details of my convoluted journey
  • 2. How should we prep for treatment? He is having radiation to his whole neck and I want to be prepared. 

    If you send me a private message ( click on my name. You’ll see a + sign at top right. Click on that and it should give you a drop down menu that will include send a private message) 

    Rad Chat ( a radiotherapy podcast) have just done a useful one on prehabilitation. I can give you the link. 

    Dani 

    Base of tongue cancer. T2N0M0 6 weeks Radiotherapy finished January 2019

    I wrote a blog about my cancer. just click on the link below 

    https://todaymycoffeetasteslikechristmasincostarica.com 

    Macmillan Support Line - 0808 808 00 00, 7 days a week between 8am-8pm

    Community Champion badge
  • Hi Dani - I'm very sorry that I posted and didn't respond for two weeks. Lots going on as you can imagine. 

    I'm very grateful for your response and thank you for your sympathies! 

    I really appreciate all of this information and I will certainly stay close. Dad I and don't live in the same country, but will have a call with his doctor soon to find out more. They haven't said anything about a feeding tube yet, but I will certainly ask. That is also good intel around moisturizing! 

    So glad to hear you are doing well after five years!

    x

  • Hi Peter, 

    Thank you so so much for this thoughtful reply and I'm also sorry to you that it's taken so long for me to say anything. 

    i'm sorry it's been a long hard road, but so glad to hear that you are well now!

    I'm sure I will ask more as he gets into treatment, but this is very helpful. 

    He was also trying to avoid radiation if we could, but it's now come to that point and I'm glad that it's treatable. 

    So glad that your side effects were temporary and you are doing well. 

    Thanks for taking the time!

    S

  • Thanks, Dani! You are so kind. Will send you a private message soon. Appreciate you! x