Hi everyone
Bit of back ground.....mum (80 yrs young) was diagnosed with mouth cancer end of Jan 2021 -Scans advised not in the jaw bones and 3 lymph nodes effected and then her referral to the cancer unit advised it was stage IV. Mum suffered so much with pain before diagnosis and certainly after it almost seemed to get worse on a weekly basis and it was very distressing to see her suffer with so much pain. Roll forward 10 weeks when surgery finally took place (quite a few delays) and mum underwent 13 hours of surgery. Pathology report was given to us 19 days ago ...and they advised it had spread into the top jaw and gone into 6 lymph nodes and they did not get a good enough margin around the tumour. They recommended 6 weeks of radiotherapy -which they wanted to start next week - mum thought long and hard about it but 5 days ago she told them she did not want radiotherapy treatment.
Last Tuesday mum felt that her mouth didn't feel right and it took 3 calls to the hospital to get her reviewed which we went to yesterday. The registrar thought something didn't look right and in the area of the "native flesh" as it had gone lumpy and bumpy and "looked odd". She said it could blocked saliva glands but wanted to carry out an immediate biopsy to rule out that the cancer had come back already. It's only been 6 weeks since her surgery - where we were told they removed the whole tumour!!! The registrar did say mums tumour was quite aggressive.
I am dumb stuck - could it be that the cancer back so soon - they wanted to start radiotherapy next week with aim of preventing it from coming back - but is it too late already?? I just don't know what to think.
We are a very positive family but have found over the past few months we've had to become quite pragmatic and I am trying to stay positive but this has really side swiped me. I knew that without RT it would probably be back but had no idea it could be back this quick. I know it's not confirmed yet - results in 2 weeks - but the surgeon's behaviour yesterday was just like the first one back in January where they wanted to perform the biopsy as soon as possible.
Has anyone got any advice? I know nothing is definite until the results are in - but how do I support mum through the next couple of weeks?? How do I cope?
Thank you for your help
Good evening Linbak64, sorry to be hearing this latest news, in reality, it is possible for it to return as they can never be 100% sure they have removed all the tumour, my consultant said the best way to describe it is "when you pull up a weed you hope you pull all the roots as well but sometimes small parts of the root is left behind". I have had it come back twice after my first operation but it was about 8 /10months before i noticed things were not quite right, mine was also classed as aggressive. Ten weeks does sound a bit early, its good to know your mum has been seen quickly as the sooner they find out the results the better it is for all concerned. I fully understand how hard it is for you all, im very positive much like you and your family, fingers crossed for positive results. Best wishes.
Chris x
Its sometimes not easy but its worth it !
