Dad post op eating and weight

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Hi all

My dad has just started his post op chemo but I continue to be concerned over his weight and lack of routine with eating. Dad is around 10 stone (maybe slightly under). He looks so much thinner now since surgery and I do worry also whether he can handle the chemo as his body has now gone through so much. I've spoken with the dietitian a couple of times and tried all the things she suggests. Milkshakes, fortifying foods etc. She seems reluctant to prescribe fortisips for some reason? However dad can be quite picky over certain foods ( which doesn't help).

 Dad can be a bit defensive about the whole eating/weight thing which also doesn't help. He knows he has to try and form a routine but is finding it hard. I can't bear to see him lose much more weight as he can't afford to lose much more. I know it's fairly early days since his surgery and he's had a dilation/stretch since then to help with his swallowing. However, snacking regularly is just not happening enough in my opinion, and when I continue to mention it, he sometimes gets annoyed.

Feeling a bit helpless at the moment. At what stage does eating start to settle into a routine? (I know it'll differ for everyone). Am I overreacting to the eating thing? Just feel like it's dominating our lives right now and it's frustrating to not have this sussed yet. In the meantime dad's weight is gradually decreasing and I worry about the chemo affecting his strength. Thank goodness he still has his jej feed tube, but I'm going to be even more worried when this comes out.

  • HI, my partner was the same he just kept saying he feels no signs of hunger at all.  The surgeon told us let him et anything he wants not just healthy food lots of cream or ice cream butter in potatoes etc.  For weeks i was throwing so much in the bin but it gets a bit better with time I think when the pain eases and he moved about a bit he started to want things.  I would def ask dietician again for the drinks as they will help tho my fella hated them I bought him weight gainer protein instead so he had milk shakes to sip on. Maybe half cup tea and a few biscuits to dip or ice cream helped a little.  I rem the surgeon telling me just let him eat when he wants dont force him and it will come luckily it did.

    I wish you all the best 

  • Thanks for your advice Samantha. It's definitely still at the trial and error stage. I certainly know what you mean about throwing food away. That is happening alot as some food just gets wasted sadly.

    I'm trying not to get fixated on the whole eating/weight issue but it's so hard. As a daughter on the outside looking in, I can see the weight dad has lost and it breaks my heart... I know it takes time and I really hope something clicks soon. Just got to have patience.

    The fortisips I got dad, he didn't really like, it was the juice ones. I've tried some milkshakes for him and he has drank some of those. I just keep trying  to think of ideas but wish he would embrace them a bit more.

  • Yes its very difficult and I would say a bit frustrating for us, sometimes I just rang the macmillan nurses for advice without him even knowing he still dosnt like me to annoy them but they are a great help.  I hope you can et some relief/help and your dad starts eating soon x