How to be myself?

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Hi all

i  have really found the positive energy on this site helpful. I am waiting to start chemotherapy and radiotherapy but still have a week to wait before my initial appointment which is a phone call. I am struggling with these waiting periods partly because I feel so tired all of the time but also I am not quite sure what to do with myself! I am find the worry about the future difficult to shake off and I seem to have lost a lot of interest in things. I am retired so no work to focus on. I wonder if anyone can offer any advice? 

  • I felt very low and tired at this stage  and if I'm honest considerably worse after surgery. However 8 months on I feel back to my old self and enthusiastic about new ventures. Even a few months ago I didn't think this was possible,  but now life feels good again.

  • Nan, I think we all have negative thoughts and feelings, but it is important to stay positive. Why not take up a new hobby or one that you may not have done for years. It all helps. Staying on this forum will also help. 

    1. John
  • Thanks John. I have to admit that even writing the message made me feel a bit better. My emotions are so up and down But I know that staying positive will help. 

  • Thanks CJD. It’s great to hear that. It’s hard to imagine feeling good again and not tired! It feels good to be able to share on this forum though. It does help. 

  • Hi Nan

    I think everyone finds the waiting difficult, I know I did! Staying positive when the future is so uncertain is so hard. But you still have today and tomorrow and the next day and so on. A wise contributor on this site says you are not born with an expiry day stamped on your person. All we can do is live each day, not as if it were your last but as part of life. After my surgery I started counting the days as extra gifts, not knowing how many I had left. I decided to try to make every day count in some way. Not knowing what your life was like before this unwelcome interruption came along it’s difficult to advise what to do this. Perhaps contact an old friend, write a letter, do something for yourself, something that you have been putting off for some reason. Maybe buying new curtains, meeting a relative for afternoon tea. 
    Be kind to yourself, treat yourself; you deserve it.

    I hope this helps.

    Counting the days, making every day count.

    Brent

  • Thanks Brent. I feel the people on the site really understand what this is like to go through. My family are so fantastic but it’s impossible for them to understand the emotional rollercoaster I seem to be on! Before this diagnosis we were looking forward to going out more and travelling again after the restrictions of the last couple of years. The consultant is great and I know the waiting times are not that long but they seem it to me! You sound so positive and that really helps. Maybe the better weather will help as well. 

  • Yes, this site helped me. I came to experience the difference between sympathy and empathy. To empathise is to understand what someone else is going through. To sympathise is to share someone’s pain. The people reading post on this site sympathise. They share the pain, they have all experienced it themselves. In sharing the pain they somehow lessen it. 
    Posts are read by many many people. A few reply. But the many are sharing and lessening the pain for those who come here for support.

    Thats how I feel.

    Counting the days, making every day count.

    Brent

  • Thanks Brent. Your words have really helped me today.