My Dad - palliative

Hello Jade

I’m sorry about your father and that you are in this horrible situation and, unfortunately, I can’t offer any suggestions other than perhaps giving Macmillan a ring to see if they have anything suitable.  If they don’t they might be more likely to be able to point you in the right direction.

You are more than welcome to post at any time, if you have any questions or concerns about your father’s OC just ask, there are people here with lots of different experiences who can try to help.

I really hope you find what you are looking for to help your daughter and that your father is getting good care.

J x

Hello Jade

Welcome to the forum, I am glad you found the strength to post here.  I know that is it difficult to know what to say or do when you hear about a cancer diagnosis of a loved one, especially when the words palliative are used, even more so when you have a child who will look to you for support also. 

I suppose one of the important things is that children of all ages have some awareness of what death is, it is not in a true concept but it is a childlike understanding that sometimes makes things a little easier for them to cope. My children lost their granddad at a very early age, the two youngest had been living with their grandparents as had been my father-in-law's wish, I was amazed at their strength.  

I have had a look around and have found this old Macmillan booklet  preparing a child for loss, it does focus more on the loss of a parent, but I hope that it will give you some guidance.

This section on the Macmillan site gives some advice on how children may react, and also provides a booklet at the bottom of the page for you to download. 

There is also a book that is Kindle friendly, and can be bought in normal format online called When Your Grandparent Dies: A Child's Guide to Good Grief (Elf-help Books for Kids)  I do not know what this book is like, but it may be something that you would like to investigate further. 

I would also like to say that my husband was diagnosed with palliative OC, that was 17 months ago, so it is important I think, whilst preparing for the time of passing that we celebrate life and live and enjoy that as much as we can. 

We have a Family and Friends Forum here, where you too can find support during this time, please feel free to join if it is of interest to you. 

Best of luck to your Dad, and to you and your daughter, 

Take care

Lowe'