Diagnosis - husband's tumour can't be operated on

Hi tjasai

im no expert but if it hadn’t spread did they say why they can’t operate? Where is he being treated could you ask for a second opinion he’s so young .

please stay strong and never be afraid to ask questions 

sending hugs Tricia 

Hi Tricia

Hope you're well , thanks for replying . 

im waiting for a call back from the oncology nurse I saw yesterday . I understand meeting to discuss chemo will be Monday . I need a full report breakdown of his diagnosis. I was a complete mess yesterday . Today I'm determined and feeling better than I've felt in the last few weeks . 

All I know is it's localised , but 10cm and in lymph nodes .  Not totally blocking so can have liquids . He does need to see dietician. Luckily he's still slightly overweight  but it's dropping . Chemo is needed to try and shrink so they can operate . They said it isn't curative. I just can't except that ...Without exploring more things . 
Dr said it can be more aggressive in younger people . I did read a report saying otherwise I just don't what's what . So alien to me . 
We are at Nuffield private health and I'll be asking for many opinions . So so so hard to keep my husband going. We've been together since we were 20 and he's the strongest person I know . Way stronger than me . Roles have completely reversed 

All the best to you

Tiff

Well you should be in good hands then and hopefully not too long a wait !!

take care 

Tricia 

Hi. So sorry to read your message about your husband. You have such a young family to be going through all this terrible stress. You are doing the right thing by seeking other opinions because this does seem a strange diagnosis to us non medics. I do hope you can progress towards some better news.

Hiya 

yes , it does . Hmmmm so I spoke with the oncology nurse who said the lymph nodes are around the tumour and they are angry and they don't want to disturb them . they want to zap them to try and shrink first  . So everything sounds contained . I just wish they could chop everything out but I I know it's not that simple . 

I do want to speak to some others hospitals . To be honest I've even looked at some places in Germany . I'd do anything . 

I'm so eager for treatment to begin ️

Hi again. As I understand it ( and I could as a non medic be wrong) just about everybody has radio/chemo therapy treatment prior to surgery if they are progressing down the surgical route. At least, I have not read of anybody on here who has not. So that aspect of your husband's route is normal. Of course many diagnosis are not suitable for surgery and that is why so many of us on here are going down different routes. My local  NHS Upper GI surgical team work in a group of four consultants plus several consultant oncologists so seeking alternative  opinions has been readily available - not that I found this necessary in my own case.

Do have the best possible Xmas for your family that you can. I know, of course, it is going to be very difficult for you all..  

Hello Tjasai,

I understand from reading other posts that you are entitled to ask for a 2nd opinion. Some, like us, worry that this will delay the start of treatment, so my husband went with the first. 

You seem to be staying focused and level headed at this very difficult time.

Well done for carrying on with the normal things. It helps us to stay grounded and can stop our imagination running down dark corridors.

Sending love 

Lorraine 

So sorry to hear this. I’ve been thinking of you since you posted. Absolutely explore every avenue ask every question. Hope the guys in here further down the road can advise better than I as we are no further forward at the moment. Will be thinking of you all every step of the way sending love and strength 

claire X

I'm so sorry for the bad news you have been given,  how incredibly difficult for you all. 

Lymph nodes, my dad's cancer was localised at the junction where the stomach meets the oesophagus, during surgery they removed 38 lymph nodes, 2 of them, the closet to the tumor had cancer in them but none of the other ones did. So to me I find it odd that they have said that aren't aiming to cure unless they think it's in nodes that are much further away from his tumor. Hopefully you'll have more information at your next meeting. 

I can't imagine how you are feeling as you have small children and hes so young, but my heart goes out to you all.  My Dad is 77, but it's still surreal and you kind of keep pushing for a bit of normality.  Sending huge hugs xxx