Husbands diagnosis.

Hi Clinda,

Welcome to the forum and so sorry to hear your news. I care for my my wife who has a GBM and we're 9 months in. Thankfully she was able to have surgery and treatment so I guess she was "lucky" but we know that it will return sooner or later.

There's lots of really useful information on the Macmillan site about different aspects of cancer so if you haven't already have a good browse and come back with any questions. I found it really helpful just reading through the threads in this forum to see what others' experiences had been like. Although we are all looking after someone with, or suffer from, a GBM we all end up taking slightly different routes depending on how it progresses and local care provision.

If you have any questions at all then please just pop them in here. Usually someone can empathise with what you're going through.

Have you or your husband been offered any counselling at all? Either way it’s always good to talk so please remember you can call the Macmillan Support Services on 0808 808 00 00 - most services are open 8am to 8pm, 7 days a week Clicking here to see what is available. This service provides lots of cancer information, emotional support, benefit and financial guidance or just a listening ear.

Lastly, don't forget to take care of yourself. Your husband will need you to be as strong as possible so make sure you're getting a break when you need one.

Best wishes

Chris

Hi Clinda

I'd like to echo Chris' warm welcome. So sorry to hear about your husband. Life's too cruel.

My own husband diagnosed with a GBM4 in Sept 2020 so I can empathise with what you are going through. He had surgery followed by 6 weeks of treatment but has declined all other offers of treatment since.

Being in shock at this stage is only natural. It's a lot for both of you to take in. Take your time to process all that you've been told. Allow all the emotions to work their way through. It's the strongest and most resilient among us who show their emotions. Please reach out here anytime. This is a safe and supportive space and there's always someone here to listen, to hold your hand and to offer that virtual hug when its needed. You're not alone. We're here for you.

It’s always good to talk so please remember that you can also call the Macmillan Support Services on 0808 808 00 00 - most services are open 8am to 8pm, 7 days a week Clicking here to see what is available. This service provides lots of cancer information, emotional support, benefit and financial guidance or just a listening ear.

for now though I'm sending you a huge virtual hug and lots of positive energy. Stay strong and please make sure you look after yourself here too. It's not selfish to take some "me time" It's essential to help you recharge your own wee batteries. This is an emotional rollercoaster ride.

love n hugs

Wee Me xx

Thank you.

Hi Clinda,

I'm sorry to hear that. You both have any awful lot to wrap your head around.

Can you please make contact with the hospice early? An early conversation with them makes a really big difference. One of the big challenges is dealing with all the unknowns, and at least in taking to them you can find out all the things that you are entitled to, all the help they can provide, ask the other services they can point you to. 

Sorry if I'm laying it on a bit thick, but I think our tendency as carers is to struggle on until we are nearly at breaking point. Palliative care teams are an absolute mine of information, and even if you don't need any help for a few months, just knowing you have a number to call makes a huge difference.

What I encourage people to do is... Call the hospice and explain your situation. They will probably tell you to get your GP to do a referral, so that they can have early engagement with you. But I think it's easier to go to the GP once you have talked to the hospice.

If you don't know which is your local hospice, you can go to: www.hospiceuk.org/hospice-care-finder and put in your postcode.

I know this is a really tough time. I've been there. Please use this forum if you have questions or just want to vent. Please let your friends and family know what you are going through so that they can support you. And if anyone wants to help, just say yes. 

Big hug...

Pete

Thank you. We have been put in touch with hospice outreach and have had a home visit.  Feel reassured by them all and hopefully I can start to cope with help.

Hi...

That is great.  We have an excellent hospice system in this country and although it is terrifying to be referred - they really know what they are doing and are very well connected to other services.  Remember they are there as much for you as for your husband.  I found the link to the hospice extremely helpful both for me and my wife.  Three months on from Fi's death, I still think gratefully most days of all the support I received.

Please do reach out if you are struggling.  You are doing an absolutely essential job and we all want to help you do it to the best of your ability.

Pete