Just checking in

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Hi Everyone,

Really just thought I'd check in and see how you were all doing?

Mum is still very much the same, we've just got back from a week away with the kids which was nice but the constant worry is so exhausting. Went in to visit tonight, she's no better but no worse. I'm just having a really sad day today, it feels literally like we are trudging along a really dark tunnel with no end in sight, and even if there was an end, that's not something you ever wish for.

Hope everyone is well xx

  • HI

    lovely to hear from you. Glad you enjoyed your break but I can totally relate to the worry about being away.

    A GBM journey is an endurance event and exhausting on so many levels.

    I likened it on several occasions to an ultra-marathon that I hadn't entered, hadn't trained for, didn't have the right kit for, had no course map and no one could tell you how long the race was but you just knew you had to keep running.

    Sending love and light and strength to everyone still running that course. You're all amazing!

    love n hugs

    Wee Me xx

    Macmillan Support Line - 0808 808 00 00, 7 days a week between 8am-8pm

  • I love your reply  I think it sums it all up perfectly. Today was better mentally, just got to keep going one at a time. A favourite phrase is "tomorrow is a new day" and it sure is, you just never know what it might bring! X

  • Hi Sparkles123

    We've had better days. Mum passed away on 11th December so as you can imagine, the Christmas break has been really really tough. The funeral is Monday and I'm anxious. Up until now for the past 3 years there's always been something to do, to sort, to plan for. The grief of what we have endured has weighed heavy the last few days. I think it's the finality of the funeral looming and knowing there's nothing to come, just to accept what's happened. It's abit daunting. 

    I'm looking into getting some counselling or at the very least someone to talk to. I replay the events of her dying everyday and I don't think it's healthy, but I also know its early days and this won't last forever. I returned to work yesterday for the first time and I feel like I've just peopled too much, it's exhausting. I hope you are doing well xx

  • Hi ECA3.  Hugs again to you. I think my first son/my puppy (my passed away on that same day as your mum, 2 or 3 years ago...) With time, I try to forget that day they left our world, and I keep training my thoughts to think of the happy days together and the love I had for him, for my girls (2 other puppies) and my ex (the family member with the GBM) as they basically passed away 2022, 2023 and 2024. So definitely a lot of self discipline and coaching to get myself together,as much as I can but honestly the grief we endured, you are correct, I think it's eaten most of me too. 

    Funeral is Monday? It will be nice to see all the family and friends, those who come are those who respect, loved her also. Think of all the wonderful memories with each guest,if you can on Monday. Do your best. We are here to listen.

    And try not to replay those events, when you do, think of something to replace it, like how your mum displayed her love for you, or such. Would she want you thinking that cruel moment, or the years of happy memories? Try, try your best. I know its so hard. I do.