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Hi everyone, I’m new here looking for support/help with my mum’s diagnosis.

First of all I would just like to say I’m sorry for whatever reason you’re here, whether a relative looking for help or if you’ve been diagnosed with cancer yourself x

So, in August 2023 my mum was diagnosed with stage 3B cervical cancer, she had chemotherapy and radiotherapy and just before she was due to finish the treatment she blacked out and had to be taken to hospital.

Upon this hospital visit they did a CT scan which showed the cancer was now in her stomach, liver, kidneys and lungs meaning she was now stage 4 - terminal. 

She started a new chemotherapy program having treatment every 3 weeks for 18 weeks before they would switch her to immunotherapy for two years maximum. Other than hair loss and weight loss she seemed to be doing fine until she found herself unable to go to the toilet (stool) and was in a lot of pain so she was admitted into hospital again and we found out she had a perforated bowel, after a week they sent her home and she continued her immuno but was still in discomfort. - This was 6 weeks ago.

On Sunday she was taken into hospital again with a suspected UTI, upon doing another CT scan they found a tumour in her bowel that had made the perforations worse and her bowel contents were now leaking into her bladder, causing the infection and have decided to withdraw any further immunotherapy whilst also seeing if she is strong enough for surgery to fit a stoma bag.

I guess what I want to know is if there is anyone who’s immunotherapy has been withdrawn on here and how are you feeling after? I’m terrified of losing her, I lost my dad just before Christmas and have two children (8 & 12) who love their nan but I also have been fortunate enough to never have lost anyone to cancer and I have no idea how these things work 

  • Hi  and welcome to our group.

    I have read your post with such sadness for what you and your mum are going through after so recently losing your dad. I can’t begin to imagine how hard this must be to deal with, especially since you have young children.

    I personally haven’t had immunotherapy, but I hope if others have experience they will share what’s happened with them and for how long they have had treatment. Were you told whether or not the immunotherapy could be re started if the bowel issue could be resolved by forming a stoma? I have 2 stomas due to my cancer recurring, and losing my bladder and bowel, so I do have experience of that.

    The issue of bowel perforation and the contents leaking could hopeful be resolved by having the stoma formed, but it is still a big surgery for your mum to undergo, especially considering how much she has already been through since last August. Your mum’s age and current state of health would be very important in deciding whether or not it could go ahead. I think you would need to have a frank discussion with your mum’s doctors about whether it would be possible to have the surgery, and what the implications are if it is not possible.

    How are you coping yourself with everything you’re trying to deal with right now? Have you got a good support network around you to help? I’m assuming your mum is still in hospital? 

    I’m not surprised by your fear-this is a huge amount for you to handle. I can recommend calling the support line(the number is in my signature) if you feel you would like to talk, either to a nurse or one of the other lovely staff on there. It might help to unload some of the stress, and the nurses would be able to answer any medical questions. 

    I hope you don’t mind me sending you a big hug, and telling you that you are amazing for all you are doing for your mum. If you ever what to chat, I am happy to listen. 

    Sarah xx

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  • Hi there,

    I am so sorry to hear of your mums diagnosis. It sounds such a distressing time. Please know we are all here for you when you need support.

    How is your mum doing now?