Loved one

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Hi, my mum has recently been diagnosed. We are awaiting the stage and size yet. She is very nauseous and in pain.

Does anyone have any advice how I can help? Symptoms to look out for? Home remedies to ease the pain? 

I would be extremely grateful. 

Thank you 

  • Hi  and welcome to our group.

    I’m sorry to see your mum has had this diagnosis, and hope it’s not too long before the stage and treatment plan are determined. Her consultant or gp can prescribe medication to help with both the nausea and the pain so I’d recommend your mum gets in touch and explains how she’s feeling. Has she been taking any standard painkillers like paracetamol? 

    We are all different in the symptoms we experience, so it would be difficult to say what to look out for in particular. My biggest “thing” when I was first diagnosed and when I had a recurrence was a hot water bottle on my pelvic area where my pain was. I had one virtually 24/7! It did help, plus I was prescribed stronger painkillers as time went on. For nausea, I had peppermint tea, and ginger biscuits. 

    She shouldn’t have to suffer with these symptoms, so I hope she can get some relief soon. You’re very welcome to come here and ask questions as things move forward and we’ll do our best to help support you. 

    Sarah xx


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  • Thank you for replying! 
    Do you have any advise when it comes to chemo? I know my mum is scared for this part of the treatment. Though she is trying to hide it x

  • Thank you for replying! 
    She is now drinking the teas, though the codeine she’s been given is wiping her out. 
    I will also try the hot water bottles too, thank you. 
    Do you have any advise when it comes to chemo? I know my mum is scared for this part of the treatment. Though she is trying to hide it x

  • Hi  

    The chemo was the easiest part of treatment for me, but your mum will probably just be a bit scared of the unknown.  I don’t know what chemo your mum will be having but mine was Cisplatin.

    It’s a long day as it takes several hours, and I would recommend wearing comfortable, loose clothes where it’s easy to go to the bathroom as you have to take the chemo pump stand with you and need to be able to do things one handed. 

    She will need to drink lots of water to keep her kidneys well flushed as chemo can be hard on the kidneys. Take something to do-phone, Ipad, book, puzzle book etc to keep occupied. Some snacks are also useful!

    Having chemo was completely painless-once the cannula was in my hand I didn’t feel anything and I actually found it very relaxing in the comfy recliner chair.

    Tell your mum to make sure that she lets the nurses know if she experiences any kind of side effect. She will be given anti sickness medicine through the IV when having the chemo, and will be given tablets to take home. If she is having Cisplatin, this is usually a low dose chemo to help make radiation more effective and doesn’t result in hair loss.  I never felt any side effects from the chemo, and was never sick or even nauseous, it wasn’t a difficult experience for me at all, and I hope it’s the same for your mum. 

    However if she is not having Cisplatin and having a different chemo, things can be different. You haven't mentioned radiotherapy, but I’m assuming your mum is also having this and that her stage has been established? When does her treatment start? I hope it’s very successful for her and that she tolerates everything well.

    Sarah xx


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  • That’s a really good point  about everyone’s experiences being unique. We are individuals and all react differently, so some people can sail through with little negative effects while others may struggle. And statistics are not something I would ever even bother reading-they are out of date when they’re published and don’t reflect the person at the centre of things. 

    Sarah xx


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  • Hi

    Depending on the stage/ size etc  can make a significant difference to the treatment plan  i have stage 4 so have had surgery, chemo and now about to have chemo and radiotherapy combined. She should never have to suffer in pain so speak to her doctors who can adjust her meds accordingly. This can be with her gp.

    In regards to the chemo, I had a combination of carboplatin and paclitaxel and the side effects were quite bad, I struggled with eating all together, nausea and sickness, hair loss and generally feeling rubbish, however they reduced the dosage half way through which helped a lot. So I would advise that your mum is really honest as changes can be made. I am about to start with cisplatin in 2 weeks time alongside radiotherapy so hopefully the side effects will be milder as others have suggested. 

    Good luck with everything 

  • Thank you for your reply I really appreciate it. She has spoken to them and has been given medication to help with the side effects. The hair loss was painful for her, I didn’t realise that the hair loss process would be painful, but I’m helping with scarf wraps and she is still as beautiful as ever. 
    I’m sorry to hear you are also going through this, and I wish you a speedy recovery and send you hugs and positivity. 

  • Hi Sarah, 

    She is having a more aggressive chemo, so she has lost her hair within this past couple of weeks, which I didn’t realise was a painful process, she couldn’t rest her head as it was sore. She is getting some oils to help with the soreness. She has chemo ever 3 weeks currently, she has been given medication to help with her side effects, which seem to help, she has less of an appetite and can become nauseous. We are also in the stage of checking if she has the BRACA gene, as we have had a lot of cervical, womb and breast cancer in the family. I am also being tested.

    The actual chemo is long, but she is allowed a family member with her and has been taking her kindle, bless her. 

    Thank you for your reply, I really appreciate your advice and support. 

  • Hi  

    Oh, your poor mum. I haven’t got any experience of the more aggressive forms of chemo for this cancer as I went down a different route, but I have heard from others that losing your hair is a painful process. I hope the oils are helping soothe her head. 

    I’m glad she can have someone with her for her chemo sessions-my partner was allowed to sit with me and it really helped to have the company. It can be very usual to lose your appetite, especially if she is feeling nauseous, and eating little and often was good for me. I just ate what appealed to me throughout my treatments, so long as I was having something. 

    You’ve had some really good advice from  especially about you mum letting the staff know exactly how she is feeling. There are lots of different anti sickness meds for example and I didn’t feel the one I was prescribed was very helpful. Recently, for another medical condition I have, I was prescribed something different and it was much better. 

    How are you feeling yourself? I’m sure it’s very tough to watch your mum go through this-I know I found that with my own mum. I hope you’re taking some time to look after yourself. 

    Take care

    Sarah xx


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