Remission from cervical cancer

I had cervical cancer for the second time in may 2024. I had to have a pelvic exentatation and now have 2 stomas. Yes they saved my life but I don’t want to be like this and I u destined how you feel. I get down and low the way I am and think I should be grateful because I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for this major operation. It takes time. It’s been over a year for me and I have good days and bad. I’m 50. You’ll get through it. 

Thank you. I thought I was going to have an exentatation so I know how difficult the decision to have it done must have been. 

Hi Purple girl 

I remember chatting to you in the stoma group when you thought you might need an exenteration. It’s great news you’ve not needed that and have been told you’re in remission! 

I think it comes as a surprise that we are filled with emotions we didn’t expect at this stage-i felt very flat after I got a NED result after initial treatment and then again had very mixed feelings after my surgery. For me it was compounded by the fact that my attempted radical hysterectomy was abandoned, after I’d been opened up, due to the radiation damage. It took me time to accept that and get past it. I think it’s very normal to feel some very strong emotions even though your surgery was successful. 

You’ve had lots of treatment and then a major surgery within a short period of time, and I think that’s tough to deal with. Sometimes we can just get overwhelmed by how we’re feeling and maybe a bit of guilt that we’re not jumping for joy when it’s over. Friends see you as “cured” but if they haven’t experienced a cancer diagnosis themselves it’s really difficult for them to understand.

Part of that too can be the fear of recurrence which I found did lessen with time. I’m not sure if that ever goes away completely, but it is certainly nowhere at near the front of my mind nowadays. 

I hope that as time goes on and you recover, you start to feel real happiness-but just give yourself time to gently recover from what’s happened to you. You’ve had a good result and that’s amazing!

Sarah xx

Hi Star10473 

I haven’t seen you post for a while, and I’m sorry to read you are still finding things difficult-having had this surgery, I do completely understand how you feel. 

It’s  hard for us to live with our lives completely changed, but I try my best to focus on the positive things in life because I would not be here without the surgery. Yes, I get down from time to time, but I had no alternative to the surgery to be able to survive.

Have you ever tried counselling at all, or would you maybe consider it? It might help you-I know it helped me. Are there things which you find particularly difficult still? 

Sarah xx

Hi Sarah, that means a lot. Thank you so much. You have definitely hit the nail on the head. Yes definitely happy that I could have the hysterectomy. It was a robotic one so quite cool really.

Because it did go to my lymph nodes there is chance of it coming back somewhere else but hopefully not! I don’t want to worry about it all the time!

As you say I will feel better over time. It’s been such a long time and I think I spent a lot of it not thinking it was ‘ happening to me’ which sounds a bit strange. 

Vikki

I don’t think that sounds strange at all-I found it hard to comprehend the surgery I was going to have and couldn’t really believe what it would entail so I spent my time in the lead up to surgery not thinking about it! That’s how I coped and we all cope in different ways.

Try not to think too much about it coming back as that’s worrying about something that might never happen, and the worry sucks the joy out of living.

I didn’t have any lymphnode involvement, but I still had a recurrence so you just never can predict what may or may not happen.

I had my latest follow up appointment in March, and 5 years on from my exenteration my surgeon considers me cured, so I’m holding onto that! 

Give yourself time, and take things easy-you can get to a better place if you just let yourself feel what you feel, but try not to stay in a place of negativity for too long!

Sarah xx