How to cope with treatment in a couple

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Hi guys,

I am having treatment for breast cancer, (had op) radiotherapy later in the month. But my husband is also waiting for his op for prostate cancer. He seems to be getting worse and in more pain every day. I am struggling holding onto my own strength ( I work full time) and managing my husbands appointments. Before anyone says why can't you share the load, my husband also suffers from fibromyalgia, psoriatic arthritis among other things. I also have a tweenie at home who is also going through her own stresses. Has anybody any coping strategies that I could use in the 10 minutes I may possibly have free each day xx 

  • Hi  I just wanted to say hi, as that sounds super stressful. I have RA/PA so I understand the pain your husband is in with that asides from anything else and what crapness is it that you have cancer at the same time! No wonder you’re stressed. I had a 12 year old during treatment too so I know you are juggling. Things I found helpful to switch off and cope was to walk my dog with a good friend so if you have a friend with a dog, do half hour when you can, walking, fresh air, chatting about anything was great. I just used to say to get her to moan at me or say tell me your stuff, so my focus was away from my life, and she got to vent too. Win win. 

    Lying in a room, with no noise, tv, distractions for 10/15 minutes, just listening to your breathing, or letting my mind wander freely, that helped.

    I got the Calm app and did some mediations, some a just minutes long, some are an hour, they have music and sounds to relax too, sleep stories, etc. they’ll offer you a half price subscription quite quickly after you download the app, a few bits of contents are free if you hold your nerve. 

    Reading magazines rather than books. I didn’t have the mental energy for a book but reading a magazine was less commitment and seemed easier.

    Hope that helps a bit and good luck xx