** APRIL-MAY 2022 BREAST CANCER CHEMO **

Hi Mods thank you so much for doing  this for us it is much appreciated by us all. xx

Found out Weds just gone I'm having 6 cycles of chemo - 3 each of FEC and T. From diagnosis in Jan through surgery and then histology showing rapid growth and upgrading both grade and stage I have been fine. Chemo has made it all very real and very scary. Had hair chopped today to much shorter style - I will be cold capping but it was long and is very fine and a lot of it, so prone to tangling very easily - giving it a better chance if I can get awY with brushing it less, I hope!

4 appointment letters arrived from the hospital today - 1st chemo infusion appears to be Weds 20th April - sooner than I expected. Everyone at home now struggling because I'm now struggling. And I don't get to go back into work - I work in a school and we broke up yesterday for Esster and don't go back until 25th April :( Normality feels like it's been ripped away from me this week.

Hi, massive hugs to you. It's very daunting and your life becomes one long round of hospital visits. I was diagnosed last June, lumpectomy in August, chemo October- February and radiotherapy in March. My active treatment is now complete.

I went back to work last week (I'm a teacher) for a couple of mornings. It was very strange being back after 8 months off. 

You will get through this and come out the other side, it's hard but you just have to keep moving to the next appointment, try not to think too far ahead. 

Lou x

Hi Toffee, 

I had a similar situation, I work in a school too, we broke up for Christmas then I saw the oncologist again, had a pre chemo appointment, had a PICC line fitted and I started chemo in Jan just before we went back.  I didn’t realise when I finished in December that the oncologist wasn’t going to let me go back into work at all because of the high infection risk - I had agreed with the head to just go in whenever I felt up to it.

I am two thirds of the way through chemo now so treatment days and working from home when well is my new normal. I still have my surgery to come so doubt I will be back physically at work until September at the earliest assuming no further treatment is needed after my surgery.  

It has been hard as it is all a big shock to the system but after a while I have accepted it and am just concentrating on getting through each week. The family is more settled now too.

Best of luck with your chemo, I found the waiting for it to start has been the hardest bit so far.

Tis x

That’s where I am right now. I’ve just had a second op as the margin wasn’t big enough the first time, and that will be reviewed at the beginning of May. I hate the thought of chemo looming over me.  I’m 10 minutes away from the Christie so at least I won’t have long travel times when I feel rough. And as I’m retired I can get well in my own time. But waiting for it all to start and the uncertainty, is hard sometimes and that’s where groups like this really help.

Hi Sensible, 

Hopefully your second op has gone well.

Waiting for chemo can be hard as there are so many unknown factors. Everyone’s reaction to it is different so you don’t know exactly what to expect and even when you have started treatment each drug and cycle can be different from the previous one.   I was so relieved when the first one was over and am 14 weeks in now. 

I am lucky to be only about 15 mins from my hospital.  We have a Maggie’s centre there who I have found to be a great support -  have you been to  the one at the Christie? I have bloods and treatment on the same day so spend the hour waiting for my blood results just chatting to the volunteers at Maggie’s over a cuppa and it makes me feel better and calmer.

Tis x 

Yes there is a Maggies at the Christie, in fact one of my friends works there, so I shall certainly be trying it out. I do try to only look one stage ahead. I’m sure the people at Maggies will be a great help in the in-between times.

Im so sorry to hear this and feel I can empathise.

I had high grade DCIS in breast and atbleast 1 node confirmed on Friday. Am seeing the oncologist on 28th and it is most likely that I'll start straight away with chemo. 

I have 2 children of my own (5 & 8) but I also work with children. Im a childminder. They told me on Friday that I wont be able to work during chemo because of the infection risk. 

Feeling quite lucky in that I spoke to the parents yesterday and they are all keen for me to spend some time with the kids over the holidays while Im still well. 

But i keep having a cry when Im by myself, my own kids and my work kids have been through enough without this! The pandemic was so bloody hard on them, many of their families split up as a result, some have lost loved ones and now Im not gonna be around. Ive been a safe space for them for years and now Im gonna not be there and look weird and be ill.

Sorry for the rant. I just mean I think I understand, giving up work (even if its justnfor now) is so hard, especially when theres kids involved.

My gastroenterologist (I have ulcerative colitis AND breast cancer) said to use the kids as a goal. She said make getting back to your kids one of your milestones and that has helped a little bit.

Sending you love and hugs and positive vibes xxx

That must be really upsetting for you. One thing I have noticed (not. just online but in RL) is how many women carry anxiety and guilt about the people they feel they are failing because they are sick. After my last surgery I talked with a lady recovering on the ward who was more concerned about her husband coping with the stress than herself, and upset that her daughter’s boyfriend couldn’t stay over while she went through chemo. For some of us it’s habit or displacement activity but it’s a very real issue for many women used to caring roles and that is why places like this where worries can be shared are so valuable.

I couldnt agree more! Its a huge issue. 

I keep saying sorry to everyone....... Like its my fault....... Ive started saying Im not going to say sorry because its not my fault. 

Read a think today that said instead of saying sorry, say thank you. Instead of sorry I cant have the kids anymore, say thanks for letting me be part of your family life for so long...... Its gonna take some practice.

Thanks again for your kind reply. This online community has been invaluable for me so far xx