Just diagnosed

Hi Charlie64

Sorry you have to be here, but welcome. It’s an awful time following diagnosis, I recall the shocked and numb feeling you are describing. Your final treatment plan will depend on the outcome of pathology after surgery so your team know the grade and whether any lymph nodes are affected. Have you been told which type as this dictates treatment plans? Mine was ER+ and HER2- and I had a lumpectomy six months ago followed by 5 radiotherapy sessions and now on Tamoxifen for 5 years. When I was at the stage you are now I thought life would never be the same again but I was wrong. Life can be, and for very many people is, great once again. These feelings will ease when you know more and what is happening when. 

Regarding telling people, if you don’t want to, or don’t feel up to it, then simply don’t. It is your story to tell to who you want when you are ready. Please trust me and others when we say that this is the worst part, the treatment is not as scary as the thought of it is. Any questions, or you need some moral support, then just shout, we are all here for you. x 

Dear Eebee. Thank you for your reply and supportive words. So kind of you. I’m sure you’re right. That this is the worst part. I wasn’t told the type just that it was cancer and I needed lumpectomies. ? Presumably they will know what type with the biopsy results? One of the lumps was in my lymph node. Not sure if this means the cancer has spread already? I seem to have all the questions now!! 
Trying to stay positive. 
thank you. 

I was told the type and also told provisionally it was Grade1-2 from the biopsy results. Turns out from surgery results my main lump was Grade 2 but I had a couple of little Grade 1s and some DCIS for good measure! 

Please try not to go down the rabbit hole about spread until you know anything for certain. Lymph nodes can be affected by all kinds of things. Even if it has then those lymph nodes would likely be removed and your treatment plan would take this into account.

It’s great you are trying to stay positive as that can be tricky at times, but breast cancer treatment has developed so much and outcomes getting better all the time. x

So my message to friends waiting yesterday:

I have Grade 2 invasive lobular cancer.
MRI Monday to see if it is contained or spreading out within the breast. That will decide on a lumpectomy or mastectomy. Luckily lymph nodes/armpit atm look ok, so that’s good. They’ll take a couple out when they do the surgery to check.
I’m good in myself and glad I now know what I have been knowing for the past 2 weeks and feel exhausted over tbh
Relived and super glad I went for the mammogram.
Consultant said I would never have felt it x
Onwards and upwards
Feeling positive x

Hugs to you. YOU ARE SO NOT ALONE! I’m here!! Xx 

Hi Charlie64,

I had a lumpectomy some months ago and lymph nodes removed, I  finished my radiotherapy recently and have now been told I am clear. What I can say, is that you have nothing to worry about we’re the operation is concerned, it is a shock when you are told, but it is important you take a bit of time to let it register and sink in. The strides made in modern cancer medicine these days is amazing and they can do so much for you. However, there is so much you can do for yourself too.

You have made the first big step by finding the Macmillan site, also do visit your nearest Macmillan centre, a list is on here, or ring them on 0808 808 0000, they are superbly helpful and give you lots of great info, do walks, talks, help with benefits, bills, open 10-4 Mon-Fri for coffee and chat and lots more - it may also be beneficial to take your husband along, as they can chat to him too and it can be in complete confidence if you wish. Please also get a good support structure in place, family, friends, good work colleagues, I’ve lived on my own for nigh on forty years, but realised you can’t do this on your own. I also go for a short walk every day (British weather permitting) and do a daily diary, this is mega helpful, as it gets everything off your chest and out of your system. It is important during the day to keep yourself occupied, hobbies, interests etc., it stops you from dwelling on what is going on. You may also find it beneficial to listen to a meditation podcast, they really help you to relax especially when you are trying to get to sleep. I use one called ‘Go Gently’ by Christine Elizabeth Smith, it does a lot for me. Whatever you do, do not visit Dr Google as there is so much conflicting information, your head will spin and it will stress you out, listen to your medical team and ask your breast cancer nurse as many questions as you want. Also, you get great support on here.

I know it’s hard sometimes, but try and keep as positive as you possibly can, have positive people around you and dump the negativity, above all, be kind to yourself - I promise you, you will get through this. You are NEVER alone and can always come and chat to us shower in here.

Keeping fingers and everything crossed 

Take care and big hugs.xx