Emotions

Hi Olive Owl - I'm just at the same point as you.  I agree it's a strange time - stuck between still feeling like a patient (especially when you still have chemo effects like you) but being told to get back to normal life.  I've forgotten what that is!  I am almost having to re-learn who I am and what I did before the diagnosis.  I haven't thought about anything but blooming breast cancer for months and months.  I have to tell myself I'm not a patient anymore and that I'm allowed to actually enjoy myself (the occasional glass of wine comes with guilt!).  The uncertainty of the future hits hard sometimes.  One day I'm really positive and the next I've convinced myself it's coming back.  I did read a good bit of advice on here that was - if you worry and it doesn't come back, you'll have wasted all that time worrying instead of enjoying life and if it does come back, your worrying has not made the slightest bit of difference to the outcome.  Something like that anyway.  There's literally no point to worrying.  That kind of made sense to me and I remind myself of that when I spiral.  Easier said than done I know.  I do exercise more regularly and eat well and very much limit alcohol and that gives me some feeling that at least I'm doing something to help.  Ladies seem to say it gets better with time...fingers crossed.  Hope the after effects of chemo lift soon and best wishes to you - enjoy life xx