Feeling lost alone and scared

Hi Michelle123 , so sorry to hear about your Dad, and then to be diagnosed yourself so soon after must feel like a very cruel blow. Horrible to face this while the grief for your Dad is so recent and raw. I’m glad you’ve found your way here though as it’s a great place for support and shared experiences.

I don’t know your age but I have some things in common with you in as much as I also lost my dad to cancer, and have myself been diagnosed with breast cancer. However there was a big gap as my dad died when I was 27, and I was diagnosed at 59. I am nearly 5 years post diagnosis though, while he died 18 months after his. So far I have no signs of recurrence, so I hope that might make you feel more positive. Your feelings of being lost, scared and alone are very natural, particularly at the stage you’re at. It’s great that you’ve had the op but it’s still very frightening when you’re not sure what treatments lie ahead. Hopefully you’ll feel more positive when you start the next stage. It’s very early days for you in terms of adjusting to the shock of a cancer diagnosis. 

Wishing you well, keep posting and asking any questions, or just to have a rant if that helps! This is a safe place to say how you really feel to people who have an understanding, which can be difficult with family and friends. Sending love and a big virtual hug, HFxx

Hi Michelle123

Welcome to the forum and sorry to hear about the loss of your father and that you have been diagnosed with breast cancer so soon after his loss.  If you feel up to it reach out to the good folks at Macmillan for help and support at this difficult time.  Here's the link to the supports you can receive from Macmillan: Emotional, financial and physical help for people with cancer | Macmillan Cancer Support.  Also if you feel up to it read the Coping with bereavement blog under Community News at side of the page.  You may find it helpful.

Wishing you the best of luck with whatever comes next for you.

Best wishes

Daisy53

Thank you so much for your response.

I am 50 years old and the diagnosis was only found do my first initial breast screening  I didn't nearly go as it was the same week as ny Dad's funeral. I'm scared about the next steps and the lack of understanding of my family. They assume that because I've had surgery the cancer is gone. I am aware that this is only the beginning of a journey that no one knows the outcome. I am glad I have found this support network and thank you xx

Thank you Daisy,  currently the loss of my Dad is having an emense impact on me and having to deal with my own diagnosis. Xx

Hi Michelle, 

So sorry to hear about your Dad and about your diagnosis! Losing a parent is a terrible thing - I lost my Mum who also had cancer when I was 50 and I know what you are going through. Time really heals but it is never easy... Accepting what is happening to you also takes time. I've gone through so many emotions over the last 2 months after my diagnosis and surgery and I still find it hard to believe that I have cancer. Of course it's normal to be scared, but like I've said here before, breast cancer treatment is incredibly advanced nowadays and you can really help yourself a lot by staying positive. Believing that you are in good hands treatment wise is also very important - your medical team will do their very best to help you beat your cancer! You are not alone. Stay strong and fight! We are stronger than we think we are. Lots of love and a big hug!

Lana xx