This is happening to you all ….. But knowledge is power to take the next step. Once you know if and where it has spread, which most likely hasn’t, then take strength owning the next step in treatment. Xxx
Even with grade 3 and multiple nodes, your chances of survival at 5 years are way over 12% if it is just regional…and possible even with bone spread. Nobody should have given you a 12% figure without scan results and a full picture. It is really hard not to think catastrophically at first but just breath and wait for the results. try not to think worst case. Xx
Hope is so.cruel - the 12% was the American Government medical website for triple negative extensive spread - which I got to from the guardian article on the death of bowelbabe (is that right?) which had a link to the death of the writer of me and the little c within a year of her diagnosis of triple negative breast cancer.
I want to hope of course I do - but only realistic ally and only if there is any hope - I don’t want to hope for a miracle that would not help my children
Maybe being positive it too hard for the reasons you describe but I’d really aim for neutral until you know for sure if it’s spread. They cannot know it’s in your bones without scan results. Tumours can even get large and not even reach your lymph nodes, let alone anywhere else. This can still have a good outcome.
i was the same as you initially, assuming the worst. I still have very down days but try to balance the dark thoughts with realistic ones. Finding long term survivors on various web forums also helps.
I know people say treatments are coming on all the time, but they really are. In the 6 months since I’ve been disagnosef, they’ve approved abemaciclib for primary hormone positive, there’s a big petition to get trodelvy on the nhs for triple negative metastatic, trials are showing enhertu works in low HER2 expression (previously classed as negative); this is just in 6 months. Liquid biopsies are being researched as we speak. There are many, many ongoing trials.
I hope you are doing ok, please try not to over think this at this stage. I believe the larger percentage of TNBC’s are grade 3, mine is. This does not mean stage 3. Grade is the size and growth, TNBC is fast growing but Chemo is targeted to stop it in its tracks, as I said mine had shrunk and many shrink to nothing. Due to the type of cancer they hit it hard with treatment because it works. I am terrified of the treatment BUT am thankful that we live in a time where we have it and research is moving forward everyday.
I stay away from American social media groups I find them less optimistic by the nature of panic posts. I am a member of a good popular social media group for UK and Ireland. It is run by a very informative, level headed lady that has TNBC in 2016, she has written a great book, which fills you with plain English information without judgement, she talks about any fears you may be experiencing, feelings and facts on how the UK treats this. Non of us know what is around the corner but there is more than hope, there is a plan, there is treatment, there is support from survivors. This support group is great, please read the blogs. Yes we are in a journey but it’s not necessary going to one location. Please stay optimistic.
A lot of people ignore the lump for a while but you will honestly see many women on her with lumps of 6cm or more. They can be treated.
I was diagnosed in December and the panic attacks only really stopped in April - when I started chemo. I’ve also had counselling a bit and tried reiki and various therapies to help me relax.
you could try the book ‘ticking off breast cancer’ the author had the HER2 subtype, in her lymph nodes, so different to ours but her writing is just Bob on for all the emotions and fears and getting through treatment. She also had children to consider. I’d really recommend that one.
let us know your results and don’t expect the worst until you know. I did - sometimes it was bad and sometimes good news. The wait for my CT results was absolute torture but stressing just didn’t help. I am thinking of you- I remember this part and the fear so well. Xx
I found my lump in Feb, started Chemo in March, I am having 2 types of Chemo, I’m 3 weeks into second type. I have had Gene testing which may decide what op i have at the end of Chemo, so far they are talking lumpectomy breast conserving, then Radiotherapy. I’ll cross those bridges when I come to them for now I am doing good, ups and downs, not wanting to be here but I am looking after myself better than I have in a long long time. I am listening to my body and riding the waves of emotion. In all this, the beginnings was the worse, not knowing which way is up, wondering what if I had found it earlier, what if this, what if that! But I reminded myself I found it when I did, I acted on it when I did and am here now, I can not change time.
Please concentrate on making today a good day and looking after yourself. I know if it were my girls I would not want them to think of the worst case scenario I would be fighting to fill them with optimism and you deserve the same. Xxx
