Diagnosed last Thursday - CT Scan today

Hi Betts

Waiting for results is the hardest part of all. I was so lucky as the consultant asked me to hang about after my CT scan so I got the results back in about 30 minutes. Can’t imagine how difficult it will be for you to wait so long.

All my tests were done quickly so I didn’t tell my grown up kids until I had my treatment plan (which was after my CT scan). That way I knew what I was dealing with and what to tell them.

As my cancer is stage 3, locally advanced, my treatment plan started with chemo. This will be followed by surgery then radiotherapy. I suppose it depends what your treatment plan is going to be as regards what to prepare for first. I’ve already had 2 chemos, yes they were tiring but not as bad as I’d anticipated.

Do you have anyone to help you with the kids? My neighbour is helping me with house work, it’s great!, as I was too tired after chemo. I’ve applied for PIP (even though I’m getting full sick pay from work). You should/might be entitled to this too. The sooner you apply the sooner you’ll get it. You can get some grants from McMillan too plus assistance with benefits etc.

I’ve been to my local Maggies centre a few times, they offer lots of different types of support. I’ve also applied for a McMillan phone buddy, or you could find similar through the Breast Cancer Now charity. I think we all need emotional support at this time. Your BC Nurse should be able to help you with things too.

Sorry to hear about your separation. Not the best time. 

You’re going through the worst part right now (well, it was for me) due to the uncertainty. You’ll feel so much better once you have results and a treatment plan.

All the best for your CT scan this afternoon.

Bluebell xx

Interesting to see you have applied for PIP.  I have heard other people say that you can apply for PIP but when I looked it was for people who had a terminal cancer diagnosis.  I just wondered what you need to put down to be accepted for PIP

Hi Betts

im so sorry that you find yourself here. Having said that- it will give you so much support! Waiting is torture. Don’t rush into thinking you need to tell the children straight away- especially the youngest. 
For practical reasons, are you able to discuss with husband? He will need to be able to step up and really help out. 
Don’t put too much pressure on yourself. I’m 40 with two little ones (nearly 4 and 6). Once you know more from your Doctor you can then deal with the treatment process etc. X

Hi Lesley

It’s not just for people with a terminal diagnosis although I believe anyone in that category will be fast tracked.

I’m paying my neighbour to do my cleaning. After my first chemo I was exhausted and couldn’t really do it for over a week. There are other things too, like having to pay extra for home deliveries and taxis to and from treatment.

It’s awarded at a low, medium or high rate. Maybe I’ll get the lower rate and maybe I’ll get nothing. I don’t know.

I’m getting full sick pay at the moment but that’s not going to last for all of my treatment. Then I’ll definitely need extra money. 

Bluebell xx

Hiya,

Tell kids is not easy and that the age they are you cannot hide it. I know Google is not always our friend but I did search 'how do you tell kids you have cancer. There was some helpful bits there that I had in my head to use but think I just went for it. I personally ally waiting until I had all the info before telling my daughter in case she had questions.

Have to admit that I haven't completely told her the truth. She is 10 and I said that I had some bad cells that could become cancer so that is why they did surgery and for the chemo said it is to blast my body in case there are any bad cells hiding. She took it very well and then asked what was for dinner!!! I felt I needed to be careful as I had breast cancer in 2012 (she was 18months) so didn't have to explain then.

You know your kids better than anyone and will know how much you need to share and when to do it. You might find that your eldest will have more questions than your youngest. 

Sending lots of love x x