Decline promotion after breast cancer

It sounds perfectly normal to me to want a slower pace of life. Go with your gut and maybe in a year or so you’ll feel differently and be ready to take on new challenges. You’ve just been through the biggest scare and it takes its toll emotionally, mentally and physically. Don’t be so hard on yourself x

 I thought I’d be desperate to be back at work but my heart isn’t in it. I’m ten weeks after surgery and still off. Not started hormone treatment or radio therapy. Still waiting to see if I need chemo and not had my appointment with oncologist either it’s been cancelled five times. I feel like my dark hole is holding me in and not letting me climb out. 

Thank you for replying. I know deep down it was the right decision but feel like it goes against the pressure put on us be society to be a fighter and over come and achieve. I just want to enjoy my life and my family and keep responsibility to an absolute minimum.

I'm sorry you're still in the dark hole, trust me it really does get better, once the treatment is finished and you can put a bit of time between yourself and the diagnosis you will feel better. 

Radiotherapy was really managable and I haven't really had any bad reactions to tamoxifen so far. It is shit, there is no getting away from it, but it is totally doable.

So sorry your onco appointment has been cancelled, hopefully you will have the appointment soon and start to see a way forward.xx

Hi 

At present that is my diagnosis. Awaiting results on Wednesday. 
I am off work at the min and will be taking another 4 weeks at least depending on results. I’m very much in the dark hole and work is furthest from my mind. I’m hoping I will be in a better place in a few months but I do now see life differently. Will be much more aware of lifestyle and priorities. 
you make the right decision for you and your happiness. I know they say stress could be a trigger so I will try and keep stress to a minimum. Once I fight this emotional and physical  battle x

Thanks for replying Army. Fingers crossed for your results, things will definetly be brighter for you once you have your treatment plan and start to move forward.

It's just such a balance between living life to the full (and not letting Cancer take any more from us!) and prioritizing a stress free, dare I say it simpler life.

Absolutely and it’s what makes you stronger. 
my aunt had a double mastectomy 20 year ago. She took a year off work whilst going through treatment.  she was head of a very large government department until she retired last year. She still keeps herself immensely busy and doesn’t slow down she is now 69 and is an absolute role model. Full of life. She def didn’t let it beat her. 
im at the start if this journey and hope to be where she is in 20 years 

you might just need time to emotionally get back there too x 

I think it depends on the job and if you would enjoy the promoted role or it was be more stress / hours.  Sounds like the latter as you declined it.

Enjoy life , live for today, do whatever makes you happy.  

Xx

Hi  I was permanently terrified all through, 2 surgeries, chemo and rads and now letrozole 10 years. Stage 3, 19 nodes affected, but all out now. I have just got my dream job in NHS as a Specialist Nurse,  I started a week ago and am shattered, but I have to say loving it. I think about my diagnosis everyday in some form or another but I feel I didn't go through all that for nothing, yes I'm tired, I ache and can get scared but I feel fulfilled, distracted to some extent and where I should be. It is life changing yes, but I feel the best medicine is getting on, doing what u want, go with your instincts. It's not taking my hard earned career!  But I appreciate its not for everyone, and am not trying to be a fighter or anything, I have a lovely life good support, me time and am aware to manage stress and love being a Nurse.

Xxx

I was diagnosed age 51 and at 55 I applied for, and got, early retirement!  My heart was no longer in my job and the 5 months I took off during treatment made me realise how stressed I was .  3 years on from retirement I've no regrets .  

These things change your priorities, even if in the end you circle back to the same place. You can only do what feels right for you. If in the future you want that promotion there will be other opportunities. 

Hi good to read your experiences as it puts things into perspective. I wouldn't say you were lucky, lucky people don't get cancer!!! I know people often say there is always someone worse off but that's little consolation when your life has been turned upside down.

I think bc does change us and a lot of the time we see that as a negative  but just sometimes it is for the better...next week will be a year since my diagnosis, this time last year I would of been running around crazy all day then logged on until midnight, completing assessment trying to get ahead for the next day, not wanting to take leave as I had so much to do. I still work fulltime but I'm not working stupid hours and I'm appreciating other things. I'm having two weeks leave in a couple of weeks something I wouldn't of wanted to do before because I was committed to my job. I still love my work but it's not the be all and end all and I feel this is a healthier attitude.

Do what makes you happy, there's no shame in finding this situation hard, the emotional impact is sometimes as scary as the physical one. You will make the right decision.