D-day has arrived !

I know exactly how you’re feeling right now Sudge, it’s D day for me tomorrow too.  I’m feeling so nervous but trying to console myself with the improvements in treatment these days, tailored to our own particular illness and that there’s a team of people looking out for us.   I’ve also developed shingles just to add insult to injury which I’m sure has been  caused by the stress I’m feeling.  Did you speak to the Macmillan nurses.  It may be worth giving them a call if you can’t talk to anyone else.  
Good luck tomorrow I will be thinking of you. 

Its very hard isnt it and this is only the begginning ! Its all a minefield at the moment. Yes I did manage to speak to a Macmillan nurse and my GP rang me yday and she tried looking at my hospital notes but there were no reports completed so she couldnt tell me what stage i had .

The macmillan nurse explained ways to tell my family so i managed to tell my husband on Friday. My children on Sunday and my mum on Monday.

My appointment is lunchtime but been told I have been put on the end of tje list so to bare with them if late which just makes me more anxious to be honest..

Good luck and fingers crossed for you , hopefully we can catch up tomorrow and continue our journey together

Hi Sudge

Sending you big virtual hugs. The waiting is the worst.

Can you take someone with you? I did for the results appointment and was glad that I had. My best friend asked questions which I did not think of at the time, as too numb and also remembered much better than me exactly what had been said. 

Hope everything goes well for you tolorrow.

Let us know how you get on.

All the best 

Wallydug

Thanks x just need to get through tonight x i have been told i can take someone with me but i am choosing not to . 

I have written a lot of things down depending on what the outcome is so i will  be ok.

Bad enough me going to hear the news without inflicting on people i love and i dnt mean that in a  nasty way its just how i cope with most things.

Hello 

Please think very carefully about going on your own tomorrow.  It is not just the questions you want to ask. You are likely to be bombarded with information. Can't your husband go with you? It's really important he is involved with the planning. You will need his support later and he will help you remember what is said. My OH looked up everything but didn't show me what he read. He just made sure we knew the pros and cons of every stage. There were times when he asked about important things I hadn't imagined.

This is not a time for you to feel guilty about burdening them. They probably want to help you anyway.

I hope the meeting goes well and nothing too complicated is required for your protocol. I expect the appointment was brought forward because the onco wants to finish early on Friday. There was a gap, he has the results he needs and you were available.

Take care. Love Karen

I will be fine , i cant ask my husband he doesnt deal well with stressful situations and i will be the one consoling him i'm afraid. He hasnt dealt with it at all well since i told him on friday. He wouldnt ask any questions or retain any information to tell me later either,he also wears hearing aids and we have 2 different conversations so he wouldnt hear most of it. My daughter isnt coping well either but refuses to talk about it and she cant come as we would have to take my grandson which would be unfair on both of them. My mum offered but she isnt good herself with her own health issues.

I know i will need their support in the coming weeks,months ,years but for tomorrow i need to go alone .

Thankyou i hope it goes as well as it can too

Can sympathise with you on the husband front. Mine is very deaf. No help at all in the meetings with Breast Surgeon. You probably find you spend most of your time translating what is said to him which means you can't concentrate on what is being said to you. You will get an avalanche of information thrown at you. I found it easier without him, dealing with it in a practical and matter of fact kind of a way, concentrating on what the best solution might be and understanding the various options available. Looks to me like they know how to help you and are keen to get on and discuss it with you, get a date arranged for op etc. Let us all know how you get on and good luck. Keep calm. This is all very treatable.

Thank you so much for your message. I am trying to keep calm but every now and again i have a wobble and start the what ifs and wondering how much of my grandchildrens life i will see etc.

Its the waiting i think it gives you too much time to think about everything and read too much information.

It also happenned very quickly one minute i had an abcess which my dr usually prescribes antibiotics for but it was a locum and she wanted to see me first. Then she checked my notes as my routine mamogram had been cancelled due to covid.

She asked me to ring the unit people to make an appointment but they said i needed referring by dr to been seen quicker at hospital so my own GP referred me and 2 days later i got an appointment letter for last week.

I only expected to go for mammogram but ended up in with consultant first where he did a quick examination and scan and sent me for mammogram.

I then had to wait for another scan and while they did the scan they performed biopsies from a lump amd under armpit and then i had to see consultant again who said it was cancer and i would need an op and he would see me to discuss treatment options after the reports were back.

I have had so many breast abcesses and scars from where they have been and where hospital have removed them i didnt even know i had a lump i just thought it was scar tissue i could feel.

I supppse i should be grateful i had fhe locum DR but cant help wondering how long the lump has been there and whether it has had timen to spread.

Hoping with all my heart its not and i have a little longer on earth to be with my family who i love to bits but just feel this is something i need to do alone first to be able to gather all the information and then let them know.

You hit the nail on the head on hubby front i would be translating it all for him too and i just think it will be easier to go by myself. I had the news last week when i was alone today is just for my treatment options and what type of cancer and at what stage it is so i wont be as upset or shocked today as i was last week when they dropped the bombshell.

So sorry for rambling and the long message its just easier here than talkin to my family about it.

I will be back later to share whatever news i have an no doubt more support from this site.

Whatever the results and decisions are today from what i have read on here it is going to be a long road with mamy ups and downs.

Just hoping its a hill to climb and not a mountain.