MBC - do i make plans?

Hi LauraJayne, Just wanted to say I’m thinking about your post and considering my answer because I don’t want you to think you’ve not been heard and yet I want to think properly. My heart goes out to you for this totally crap hand you’ve been given x I’m sure others will be along soon too xx

Hi LauraJAyne,

I read your post with sadness and empathy. I am in a similar position to you but am some 30 years older than you.

I completely understand your concerns about what to do for the future when you don't know how long your own future is. I recently needed a new mobile phone and rather then get tied into another 2 year contract bought a phone outright so there is no contract to sort out at some point in the future. Trivial I know in comparison to your dilemma but the basis of the problem is the same.

Having been diagnosed in November last year I am a bit further along the journey. I have met so many people through chemo treatments, contact with the local hospice and attending general oncology appointments, many of whom are between 5 and 10 years along the palliative route. It gives me great hope as it confirms what I was told by my oncology team.

Given this knowledge I think you should speak to your husband and find out what he wants for your shared future. We are not born with a sell by date, so try not to focus on what might happen but live every day to the fullest. If that means renovating your house with your husband and you feel well enough to do it, you will both get much joy from it. On the other hand he may feel that the house is not important and wants to do other things with you all the while you are able to.

A 6 week HOPE course I attended at my local hospice taught me to break problems down into smaller pieces and its amazing how your viewpoint changes and how the impossible suddenly becomes completely possible.

Sending big hugs. Im happy to chat anytime.

Julie xx

Hello

sorry to read about your diagnosis. I am in a similar position I was diagnosed with Mac in April this year. MBC isn’t the end as many folk live a full life with secondary cancer. I am currently on palbociclib and letrozole and there are many other treatments to try if this one doesn’t work out  Since starting on this I’m on a phased return to work and looking forward to my holidays in September. 
if you head over to the secondary breast cancer group there is a thread call positive secondary breast stories and it helped me feel more positive about everything. 

take care

k