I don't feel I have "suffered" like so many

Hi Sara13 welcome to the forum and so glad to hear that things have gone well for you that's great news.

Some of the stories can be very harrowing and we all seem to react differently and have different treatment plans and different outcomes so the fact that you have had such a good outcome is truly wonderful to hear and I feel that your post will give hope to many people.

Sending very best wishes to you for now. xxxx

Hi Sara

I think I can understand how you feel, I had surgery and now on Tamoxifen. No Chemo or RT, I was only aware of the cancer for 5 weeks before it was removed. I find it hard to believe I had cancer, I feel like I didn’t ‘really’ have it.

Its great that you are doing so well and don’t feel bad about it. I have felt guilty about ‘getting off lightly’ compared with others but as Granny59 says it is different for everyone.

Theres still the emotional impact and fears about recurrence.  I’m sure if you have any friends or relatives who are unfortunate enough to experience a BC diagnosis you will be well equipped to help and support them regardless.

Be kind to yourself!

Hi Sara,

and like Amalie, I too ‘got away with it’ and didn’t need chemo or radiotherapy, but ‘just’ Letrozole for a minimum of 5 years. I already had mild osteoporosis and was on treatment for that, so will need to take those tablets too for as long as I’m on Letrozole. But still feel it’s lots less than many! 
However, we still had breast cancer and are obviously at higher risk of it recurring than folk in the general population, so it does sometimes make me think........

Celebrate the ‘no need for chemo’ as my surgeon did with her wide smile when she told me, we got away with it! 

Hugs xxx

Hi Amalie,

I just looked at your profile and saw you had Ocotype DX, do you mind me asking your score? 

Best Wishes.

Hi Granny59

If it gives others hope then that would be perfect. 

Thank you 

Hi Amalie

It's so hard to explain to someone who hasn't been through it or had it so much worse why we should feel guilty, so I am glad to know I'm not the only one or going mad. 

The emotional impact is strong. I think because everything happened so quick didn't have time to think about it really. 

At the time of going through treatment I was also going through a very hard separation with my ex partner so I didn't have time to think about anything. 

I am going to see the Oncology nurses in a couple of weeks with a donation to my local cancer charity so that is making me feel better. 

Hi Moomy

Your right thank you 

Hi all, I can totally relate to this - twice! I had melanoma 6 yrs ago which was removed and that was that. Even my own mother wouldn’t believe I’d had cancer as I wasn’t ill - her words. No body really took me and my fears seriously so I ended up never telling anyone and getting on with life.

this time, with bc, I ended up with surgery chemo radiotherapy followed by the bone and hormone meds- yet I still feel like a fraud, like there’s nothing at all wrong with me. Which there isn’t!

when I read of others really going through the mill with side effects it does make me feel so very guilty, that I’m an imposter who doesn’t belong here cos I’m not suffering. Not much in my book anyway, apart from a total mental episode half way thru which wasn’t taken on board at all by my oncologist when I saw him at the end of chemo. It doesn’t help when people keep telling me how well I look, so I end up feeling like I should apologise for not looking ill!

personally I feel that the emotional impact of being told you have cancer whether your ill or not, whether you have lots of treatment or none, is totally under estimated and isn’t addressed at any stage. It causes way more suffering i feel, but that’s just my opinion. 

Dear ruthie2, I so agree with the last paragraph of your post, I think you hit the nail firmly on the head. I am currently trying to get better emotional support for my fellow patients at the clinic I attend, even patients on watch and wait regimes are worthy of support due to the pressure caused by the uncertainty it causes.

Hi Ruthie

That is uncanny as I rang my Oncology nurse today as I am going in to see them with some gifts and just to see them as their were three nurses who helped me more than I can ever say through the treatement.

I said to her that "I felt like a fraud" as I had not suffered like so many and I feel so guilty.  She said "your now Cancer free" as I have finished my treatment, just take daily tablets, but somehow this doesn't stop me feeling like it. 

It is good to know that their are others who just get it as it sounds to mad to say to anyone that you feel you should have suffered more.

At the time of my diagnosis I had other issues going on that too up way more of my mental energy than the cancer, so I just went through the motions of the treatment as I had too, but now I'm out the other side it seems to have really hit me.