I start my Chemo on Thursday 1/8

Holbox123, totally feel for you, lots of us will, those at beginning, middle and popping out the other side (this is how my super Prof describes it) 

You are not a baby, you would not be normal if you were not scared, frightened and certainly ok to cry as much as you want.  This is rubbish, none of us deserve it but your superhero cocktail is on its way. Personally I wish it was a banana daiquiri but hey I’ll take what they give to get me out at other end.

I am also neo, 24 weeks, just coming to halfway, my road to get here has not been easy (see my profile) but the time has flown by.  Every week there seems to be the ‘next bit’ to think about, you will be busy! 

 Will friend request you xx 

Hi Daisy, 

thank you so much for adding me as a friend, I haven’t told my girls yet, they are 27 and 34 but the youngest is really sensitive. They live about 100 miles away and I wanted to make sure I knew as much as possible about the grade and stage before I told them (it’s stage 2 that’s a positive but doesn’t stop my thoughts) they’re visiting on Friday, so i’ll Be telling them on Friday.

i just don’t feel like me, it’s good to talk to someone who knows what’s to come, thank you x

Freda1, (sorry can’t tag her), is one day ahead of you, starts chemo tomorrow so be good person to link with too.

Shout if you need anything, I am by no means an expert but always happy to talk x 

Hi Holbox123 ,

I landed on this rollercoaster e few weeks ago my story is on profile . I have my first app. With oncologist on the 5th . My treatment is the reverse to to yours and have

already had mastectomy 3 weeks ago . 

I also can't stop crying since being told I needed chemo then herceptin and know I'll still be crying on the 5th . But I also know I most probably will look like I'm coping when at times I won't be .Which is when I'll come on here .

This forum is the best place to come for a cry,rant and yes a laugh at times . There is always someone to listen and understand what we're going thru . 

Keep posting 

Thank you, this is a great place for sharing thank you and good luck x

Thanks x

Hi , I just wanted to reassure you that not everyone suffers with chemo. I am having my third round on Friday and (touch wood etc) have so far suffered minimal side effects. I got thrush and my hair is a bit thinner than normal at the back, but I still have plenty at the front and can wear a bandana or scarf and still look OK. I haven't been sick or felt sick, so we are all different. Good luck with everything! 

Hiya  

Don't you go kidding yourself, looks can be deceiving i'm sure from the outside you look like you're coping really well too. Everyone is scared of the unknown but believe me when i say, you'll go in and have your treatment and walk out thinking, wow was that it?? 

Again,everyone on here is so positive, thats because we all want to support each other, you'll be doing it in no time and its a lovely feeling knowing your advice and support helps someone else. But just because everyone sounds positive doesn't mean they are feeling that way. I've had days I've posted on here with tears streaming down my face, but when someone wants advice or support you just do it. But the same I've posted on her when I've had really bad days, and like magic people appear and support you and make you feel better.

Bring your black cloud, we all have them from time to time and we'll help to blow it away. Once your treatment starts you'll feel so much better. The time between finding out and treatment starting i cried every day, its OK to, don't think you're a baby because you're not. All of us have felt like you feel but i promise you it will pass. 

Good Luck for tomorrow xxx

Thanks so much, I guess it’s a step at a time, I am dreading telling my girls on Friday but I think it will be better when I have as they are my best friends and I feel like I’m deceiving them at the moment.

i am hoping that I come out after the chemo thinking is that it, it’s all the unknown and feeling vulnerable. Losing that confidence is a bit daunting, 

good luck on the rest of your journey, hoping to be posting more positively towards the end of the week xxx

Hi Holbox, 

Hope you had a good night's sleep? I'm sure you will have been reassured by the support you got last night so I thought I would just give you a little more this morning!

It's nearly four years since my diagnosis. I have so far been lucky.....the treatments have worked well. My friends and family look at me and are sure all is well. But I'm no different to you at the start of the treatment......there is still that little unknown niggle saying' what if' and days when some of the problems related to my own circumstances,  still get me down. So for you, with everything theoretical and unknown.....you're entitled to feel a little wobbly  today! 

But, actually, none of us can tell you what tomorrow will bring. The one thing we all learn on this long road ( and we're  being honest here....there are no short cuts....) is that everyone will react slightly ( or vastly?) differently to the same treatments. The actual  process of delivering the chemo will probably be much easier than you imagine. I know how surprised I was......I had been so worried but for me, it was over without any discomfort . It did take three to four hours. On a practical side take an easy book or simple knitting or plenty of magazines. I found that concentration was difficult....so much was going on in the room. Afterwards.????....actually I think reading recent notes from the chemo posts, the treatment may have got kinder. More people are writing that they have minimal side effects which is great. All the ads suggest research has been working on this.But you are you....and however you react, there won't  be a right or a wrong way. If you feel ok afterwards....great...if not....that's ok too. You won't  be making a fuss. It will just be your body fighting this horrible disease.....and every day from tomorrow when you start to fight it....will be a day towards recovery. 

In four years time.....you will be me. I have the memories, I have the practical advice although it's  probably out of date, but more importantly, I am alive because of the treatment you are about to start tomorrow. 

You don't have to be strong.....we can be that for you. You can cry, rant, laugh here and we'll all have had an hour or a day or a week where we have felt the same. You will cope with the unknown because you are you!

Lots of love for tomorrow.  Chat away on that chemo thread with all the others experiencing the unknown with you. Ask us ' oldies' if you think we can help with the practicalities......and don't  forget the chemo thread will turn over to an August heading tomorrow....and good luck with all the treatment you will be starting.

Karen