When does it get better ?

Hi Lottie8,

Well I think you are an inspiration, and how is it not worth it ? Because these days 75 is a young spring chicken and you are going to live a long time yet. 

There is no problem in taking the imodium and getting lots of rest so your heart doesn't get in a state. Just enjoy life at a slow pace as appropriate to a gracious lady of mature years. Sniff the flowers, enjoy the daytime TV, you are precious special and important and we are all all wanting to copy you and live to be 75 xxx

Loads of love

Owww Lottie8, 

It will get better, each day a little better, but.... you have to make your mind up that it is going to get better, it won't just happen, you have to put the wheels in motion for it to get better.  You need to look back (only for a very short time, as you are not going backwards)....

Look back at how far you have come, your journey started 18 years ago!!! 18 years ago, when treatments were so different, you got thought this, this alone we all know would of been a journey and a half, but, you did it - massive well done to you. 

So now it decided to raise its head again..... you have done this, you have had treatment and are on the way forward.  

Like Snowys Mum says 75 is the new 55 these days, embrace how far you have come - you have gone thought so much, now is the time to celebrate, I hate saying this, but, its the only way to push forward, some people went out today and won't return home - the secret to this, we have been given the chance to see that we need to live life however best we can.

I wonder, could the urgent diarrhoea be caused by anything else, diet, high blood sugars, too much sugar feeding your gut, even an intolerance to some kind of food triggering it.  It might be worth looking into this (not literally) - just in case it is something you can change.

If you feel guilty on the money that has been spent on you - then show your appreciation by getting out there and finding away to enjoy life, no matter how simple - you are blessed, it's okay to stop and look at how life is, but don't be too hard on yourself, you really don't seem to be giving yourself credit for how far you have come, you really are doing amazing.  

Sending love and hugs xxx

Thank you Helen for your kind reply. It really helped. I don’t feel much like a spring chicken or an inspiration to anyone at the moment  but I will try harder.

Perhaps when Spring really is here I will be tap dancing. 

Thank you WH. I will really make a big effort. Sometimes I feel much better for a few days but then back again. Perhaps it’s a case of two steps forward,one step back . 

I am gluten intolerant but I am obsessive about reading labels on everything I eat/drink so that shouldn’t be a problem. I will cut down on sugar and see if that works. Love and thanks x

I had really bad diarrea when I was on Taxol and I discovered that it had made me lactose intolerant, which seems to be a common side effect. Once I realised this and changed my diet the diarrea stopped, so may be worth considering.

Hi Lottie 8

This is my second tousle with cancer too. I’m in my second year of remission from non Hodgkin lymphoma treated in 2017 and I’m currently recovering from a right mastectomy for Invasive ductal cancer and narrowly avoided needing chemo (again) after a negative oncotype test following a micromet in one lymph node. 

Next step is to discuss the prophylactic mastectomy they’ve advised given my previous chest radiotherapy that increases the risk of BC on my left side. I’m 50. I can relate to your feelings about age. I feel much wearier going through treatment for a second cancer. I also feel about 100 years old nearly every time I have a cold since all of this! I also know my mood is more up and down. 

On my worse days I remind myself I’ve been through a lot, and it’s normal to have less good days and to rest and  slow up and that by taking care of myself my energy will return when my body is ready. On my good days I’m like why was I so knackered just a few days ago? 

It will get better and remember how incredible your body has been to date to cope with two cancers and their treatment and that you’re still in the early stages of recovery. make sure you’re getting input from cardiologists ( I saw the onco cardiologist team at the Brompton for full cardiac assessment) and gastroenterologist for the diarrhoea which sounds exhausting in itself. 

Hope I’m half as strong as you. Your x2 BC experience has nudged me further toward that prophylactic mx option that they’ve offered me.

Take care and be compassionate to yourself and all you’ve been through. Would you feel/say that to a 75 yr old friend going through something similar? Thought not ;-)  sending a big hug and all the best with your recovery.