Had no idea what to put as a subject, lol.
My husband was diagnosed with glioblastoma IDH wildtype, methylated. Has been through surgery and 6 weeks of chemoradiotherapy.
We are now in 2nd week of 4 week recovery period before 5/28 chemo for 6 months and apart from very annoying itching ( which we have spoken to our team about). He has dealt with everything very well. Coherent, able, etc.
Anyway, it was my birthday yesterday. My son and him had bought food for everyone that visited but 90% of it was things I can't eat or don't like. I asked, what am I supposed to eat, and his reply was, it's not all about you.
I am really upset as, I have been supporting him throughout all this and would have quite liked just one day that was mine.
Am I being selfish?
HI
a belated happy birthday.
Special occasions during a glioblastoma journey are difficult for everyone. There are so many emotions surrounding them no matter which family member's birthday it is. It is so easy for tensions to run high and for things that in the grand scale of things are trivial to escalate into more than it needs to be.
As a family we each had 3 "last" birthdays with my late husbands and it takes its toll.
At the end of the day, yes we would all like our favourite foods on our birthday but that's not always possible. There's a huge amount of compromise involved in a glioblastoma journey and endless patience.
The important thing is that you were all together to celebrate your birthday.
love n hugs
Wee Me xx
Macmillan Support Line - 0808 808 00 00, 7 days a week between 8am-8pm
Oh no, honey, you are absolutely not being selfish! You’re going through something horrible, as well as your husband, and there are always going to be difficult moments for both of you. I’m actually quite upset on your behalf though..
I have a glioblastoma IDH-mutant (diagnosed nearly four years ago), so I guess I’m trying to see it from your husband’s perspective. It’s hard to remember those early days but I’m sure I felt that it was all about me for a while. So it’s early days for him and he’s in a very new and difficult situation. Don’t blame yourself or him - if you’re managing at all, you’re doing well 
I’d like to think he might apologise to you in the future, but right now, just treat yourself. Or maybe have a separate birthday with a friend who knows what you like. You are definitely allowed to have fun too, and he will realise that.
wishing you good luck and birthday hugs xx
thanks, Leeluu. It wasn't easy but we made the best of it. We had three "last" Christmases too! (Never did like that Wham song! LOL) In many ways they were more challenging but in the end, its just a day.
A writer friend who supported her late mum through a cancer journey has written about something her mum would say every day. I paraphrase slightly but its "I'm thankful we get to have this day" It's a good way to look at it.
To me, food and gifts don't matter as much as the people you get to spend the day with. I appreciate that everyone is different though. Emotions are raw during this journey, especially at the start and the end.
If I can still offer words that support others on here going through their journey then its worth it. It would have been very selfish of me to walk away from this community just because I no longer personally needed its support and that's not in my nature.
love n hugs
Wee Me xx
Macmillan Support Line - 0808 808 00 00, 7 days a week between 8am-8pm
Dear Wee Me, your friend’s mum has nailed it - this day, this moment, it’s all precious. I struggled yesterday but I’m feeling better today, which somehow makes it even more precious.
I always find it reassuring to see you have posted a new message - thank you for not walking away! A big hug to you sweetie 
