My brother has recently been diagnosed with an aggressive brain tumour that cannot be operated on. It's heartbreaking to see the effect it is having on him and very difficult to know how to help him. He has always been so fit and healthy, this came out of nowhere and is such a shock. Any advice about how I can help him through this and what I should expect would be very helpful.
Hi Tulips
a warm welcome to the group. So sorry to hear about your brother's diagnosis.
My husband was diagnosed GBM4 in Sept 2020 so I can empathise with what you are going through. It's a real emotional roller coaster ride.
These tumours impact everyone differently so it's difficult to give advice as such. In my husband's case, his first tumour was in the area of the brain that controls speech, language and understanding so his key symptoms have been cognitive rather than physical. He's a fitness freak and has been able to keep running so far. He's run two marathons this year.
I'll keep it simple- be led by what your brother needs and wants. Initially my husband needed time to himself to get his head round the diagnosis. He would disappear for hours on end, walking for miles and miles but he needed that space. He's also been keen to "do things" so he's been skiing with our daughter, he spent a few days in Paris with me, he's been away with his friends. He even managed to get involved in being an extra for series 8 of Outlander.
This group is a safe and supportive space so please reach out here anytime. There's also a group specifically related to GBM4 - here's the link
Glioblastoma multiforme brain tumour forum - Macmillan Online Community
I've also included the link from the main website about how to support someone
Supporting someone | Macmillan Cancer Support
As for what you can expect- that's the million dollar question. I'll not lie - this is a gruelling emotional journey for everyone involved. Repeatedly I've asked my husband's oncologist what I should watch out for. His answer has always been the same "headaches, nausea and seizures". No sh*t Sherlock, I've been watching for them daily for over 2 years. More recently, since the latest scan showed 2 new active tumours, that advice changed to "fatigue and weakness on one side". The what you've to watch out for with your brother should be advised by his team based on whereabouts in the brain his tumour is.
I shared my initial experiences of this journey in a couple of community news blogs for MacMillan a few months ago. Here's the links (not sure if it will help or not)
Caring for a partner with a brain tumour – a Community member’s story - Macmillan Online Community
“I’m fine”: how do you really cope as a carer? - Macmillan Online Community
It’s always good to talk so please remember that you can also call the Macmillan Support Services on 0808 808 00 00 - most services are open 8am to 8pm, 7 days a week Clicking here to see what is available. This service provides lots of cancer information, emotional support, benefit and financial guidance or just a listening ear.
As I said this is a safe supportive space so please reach out here anytime. There's always someone around who gets it, someone to listen, hold your hand and offer that virtual hug when its needed. You're not alone.
Please also take time to look after yourself here. It's not selfish, its essential to help you be in the best position to support your brother so go for that coffee with friends, go to the gym or go for a walk but keep your own batteries charged.
For now though I'm sending you a huge virtual hug. Stay strong.
love n hugs
Wee me xx
Macmillan Support Line - 0808 808 00 00, 7 days a week between 8am-8pm
Thank you Wee me for your warm and helpful response. It is comforting to communicate with other people who understand the huge impact of this horrendous illness. 
